Life.

Healthcare Reform...

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Wed, 12 Aug 2009 02:12:00 +0000

All day today, as I worked away at my desk, I listened to passionate debate about the proposed health care reform plan by Obama. First of all, I will say that I do believe we need reform in the health care system. To some extent, the government would have to be involved. However, in my opinion, the government should not "become" health care. In all honesty, the majority of the problem lies in the insurance companies, employers, and lazy individuals who are sucking our government aid dry when they are fully capable of working and gaining their own benefits.

As a person working in health care, I feel I'm aware of some things that most citizens who do not work in health care are not. For that reason, I feel it is important that I voice my opinions honestly. While rumors have circulated and emotions run high, I find myself more fearful for our country. Listening to discussions between regular citizens of our great country and the leaders that represent them, it seems as if there is a great divide between what it means to represent a group of people and what it takes to get re-elected to office.

First of all, while your doctor does set charges for certain procedures and visits, the insurance companies are the ones who regulate the charges. For instance, a while back we began giving a certain injection in the office. After receiving payment from the insurance companies for this injection, we realized they weren't even covering the cost to administer it. Therefore, we had to raise the cost of the injection in order to get the insurance companies to reimburse us enough to cover the injection and pull a small profit. When a charge is increased, it isn't because the physician is becoming greedy...it's because the insurance companies refuse to pay the amount that would cover the injection thus increasing the cost to not only the insurance companies, but self-pay patients themselves.

Secondly, the doctor is not your insurance company and does not have the responsibility of knowing your benefits. It is important that you know what benefits you have through your policy and be aware of what deductibles and coinsurance (out-of-pocket) expense you have to pay. In my personal opinion, out-of-pocket expenses should be regulated. The high cost of insurance itself should be enough. However, I can't even begin to count the number of times someone has gotten angry over a bill because they didn't know they had a deductible and feel we should've informed them. Know your insurance plan inside and out! If you are unsure if your insurance company will pay, call and ask.

Thirdly, the government needs to desperately regulate the health care they provide now. I don't know how many times I've seen people with Medicaid who could be out working a job and obtaining benefits. Instead, these individuals suck the well dry! I worked for a social security lawyer...I met the clients...most didn't deserve or need any sort of welfare or disability. They simply needed to stop being so lazy and get to work.

Lastly, a doctor's real detriment is his overhead. The problem these days is every insurance company and employer wants paperwork, paperwork, prior authorizations, and more paperwork. However, someone has to fill that out. Therefore, you don't get the care and time you need with your physician because they are too busy jumping through hoops to please your insurance company. Not to mention, the need to hire more people increases to get these things accomplished and thus increases the doctor's overhead forcing doctors to have to decrease the amount of time spent with a patient and double book leaving you in the waiting room for an hour simply to make enough money to pay his employees and keep the lights on.

The government should set in motion law that would force insurance companies into certain submission. This should be what regulates the rates of the policies, reimbursement for the physicians (which should be 80% of all charges, if you ask me), patient's out of pocket expenses, and the fine print policies of every insurance company (such as pre-existing conditions).

For those without coverage, the medicaid system should be revamped. To be covered by such a government policy, the individual should represent need for health care, inability to obtain the benefits of health care through a employer, and be offered a plan at minimal cost. However, this should not be indefinite and should be re-evaluated on a regular basis to ensure individuals aren't cheating the system.

I could go on and on all day...but I'll have to pause for now. I'm getting typers cramp and my brain is going a mile a second...much more to come!

When the Stimulus Isn't So Stimulating...

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Thu, 06 Aug 2009 02:26:00 +0000

I started the day out with the usual Mocha at Starbucks and settled in for another day of work. Around the noon hour, the college called to let me know I could enroll online for my class. I was excited to know that with just a few simple clicks, I'd have my schedule all squared away for the Fall semester. They didn't have that the last time I was in college...my how things have changed! I ended up having to settle with Macroeconomics since the Business Law and Business Communication classes weren't at the days and times that I needed them to be. One class seems like a bit little, I know. However, when you haven't been in school for a while, I figure that the change is going to take a bit of getting used to. I'm excited all the same!

I finished with work and headed to my dad's house to take my little brother some sugar free Popsicles. He just got braces put on and was quickly discovering that they aren't as cool as they imagine because they cause pain. It was nice that I was the person he called to ask me what to expect (know that as a teenager, I had braces on from the time I was like 12 to the time I was about 18). I didn't have an easy go at it either. I ended up with a nearly broken jaw and a skin graft because the braces irritated my lower gum line. I'm sure his experience with a metal mouth will be much easier than mine was...and a lot shorter. I coached him through it though and watched him lick down a nice, cold Hawaiian Punch Popsicle.

I jetted off for a quick pick up dinner at Chipotle and off to church to do some drama activities with the kids. Wednesday's at the church are pretty laid back and fun...but I always have a very important lesson for them to learn at the end of it all. I got back home and started surfing the net when I came across an article about the Stimulus Plan helping Mom's go back to school. As I read through the article, I became more angry at what I saw. It's great that mothers are able to go back and finish their degree with the aid of the government. However, what about young, single girls that are striving to build a career, make a living, make ends meet, and desire to finish their degree? I mean, my 33 credit hours from 6 years ago never got added to because the money wasn't there. I spent the next 4 trying to pay off the $7,500 of debt I'd accumulated because I didn't want to end up with a $40,000 debt at the end of the road. Not to mention, the government only awarded me a $500 pell grant because, at the time, my parent's incomes where what they considered too high. At that time, I guess I thought maybe my parents made more than they let on. However, when I applied for financial aid as an individual, I was awarded NO pell grant. I KNOW that my parent's accumulated income was well over mine now...if not double...or close to triple. Yet, here I am, a single girl working one full time job, a part time job, and doing her part in the community. I drive what the government considers a "clunker", live in a cracker jack box apartment, and live paycheck to paycheck and end up breaking even at the end of every month. So I cut back and decided that I could hack a $150 payment every month to take ONE class towards my degree. That three credit class? Yeah...it's costing me over $500...not including books. So...I chalk it up to this...the government doesn't see financial need in anyone unless they have been knocked up or don't have a job. Nice. Neither one of those things sound very appealing to me.

So far, the Stimulus Plan hasn't stimulated my life any. The real estate in this town is a pea compared to other communities so buying a house that won't fall apart tomorrow is hard to find...thus not being able to take advantage of the $8000 tax credit to buy a first home. My "cluncker" can't be traded in for the $4500 rebate because I can't afford a car payment on a brand new car and don't trust having a new one because I don't have a garage to put it in. Believe me, I have enough dings in my door because I have to park in my apartment's lot where people are way less that careful. Finally, I can't be aided by the government in paying my school bills because I don't have a kid and actually work a job that I can keep. So far...not so good. So what does a girl do when the stimulus isn't so stimulating? The answer? Absolutely nothing. Here's hoping that SOMEONE can get a grasp on the truth!

A Little Bit of This...A Little Bit of That...

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Wed, 05 Aug 2009 03:23:00 +0000

I was determined to make today better than yesterday. Not that yesterday was "bad." It was just...exhausting! First of all, I believe I started the morning off right with some smooth Bosa Nova on my way to work. It's amazing what music can do for your senses! I picked up my morning Starbucks and arrived at the office right on time. The day mostly consisted of me staring at a computer screen while frantically trying to dig my way out of the black hole of work. I made some progress today but there's still much more to be done. I pitched some ideas to "The Boss" and was pretty pleased with his openness to them. I think the one thing that I love most about my job is that my boss actually takes me seriously...and he appreciates my work. That can't always be said. He and I both have a vision of success and I think that's what makes it so easy for me to give above and beyond. Because of this job, I've found a new motivation to learn more about how to make my career better...and to do my job better. I register for college classes on the 18th and am hoping for either Business Communications or Business Law to start off. I haven't been in school for quite some time...so I'm hoping I'll pick up on it quick.

After zipping off to pick up a quick lunch at Panera (a usual spot for me...it's close and healthy), I got back to work. It's funny...an old friend called today. It's amazing how when you haven't seen someone for so long you either pick up right where you left off or have this awkward conversation. We had no problems picking right back up where we left off. He told me how pleased he was to know I was still in a good relationship. He saw me through a lot of bad ones...and vice versa. It was an unexpected call; short and sweet. Which probably made it the best...a time to say, "Hey...I'm here...I remember you exist." Those are always good calls.

The day went pretty normally from there. I got off work right at 5 p.m. and headed to the grocery store (which I spend almost every day). I had forgotten some things yesterday and needed to drop off some movies. Steve had scored me a bigger television for my living room and so I moved the other one in my bedroom. So, yesterday and today, I spent my afternoon watching movies in bed. I'm spoiled...it's kinda nice. However, I'm afraid I'll need to be more productive the rest of the week. I spent a lot of the evening creating a new blog to tag onto this one called "KariJay as the Food Critic." It was actually Steve's idea since he knows I love good food and the Food Network. I'm always creating different things in the kitchen and he loves them. Then again, he might be faking it. However, I'd have to say I have pretty good taste buds and I like my cooking too!

That's really pretty much it for the day. I have been thinking about doing my own personal life stimulus. You know...trying to revamp my finances, health, and life in general. I thought about trying my hand at becoming green. I'm not sure how to go about it...but maybe I should try. For a while I thought the whole "going green" thing was for a bunch of hippie tree huggers. However, I've sense realized that God never meant for the earth to be as trashed as it is. His original lay out was the Garden of Eden and something tells me Adam and Eve didn't have a bunch of trash laying around there. Funny...they didn't have a maid either! We'll see what I can do...I figure I better start small and work my way up from there. I don't think I could handle a full turnaround right away. There's too much thought involved in thinking, "Am I hurting the planet by doing this?" Not to mention that going green can sometimes be expensive...just like eating healthy is. The president really needs to make some changes to that too. I mean, you've got a bunch of broke, fat, jobless people in this trash dump of an economy. The last thing they are thinking is, "Gee, I should definitely pay $5 for a bag of salad" when a bag of potatoe chips are $2.50. So, if this whole health care reform thing goes through, the government is going to seriously have to start thinking about decreasing the cost of healthy foods. Then again, they are thinking about putting an extra tax on soda. Whoop-Dee-Doo! Make the cost of healthy foods less than that of the junk foods and that would make more sense. Oh...good grief! I'm on my soap box. Definitely didn't mean to be. It's just the ramblings of a citizen that is sort of fed up with the government and these big-time execs making millions off of selling sugary cereals. It's a man eat man world out there, folks.

Anyhow...I better quit while I'm ahead. I have better fish to fry...like taking my last call and laying my tired little head on this very comfortable, fluffy pillow. I have a love-affair with my bed, really. I miss it all day long!

Don't Follow the Yellow Brick Road...Just Wear the Yellow Shoes!

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Tue, 04 Aug 2009 03:13:00 +0000

I know it's been quite a while since my last entry. Lots of things have happened since Father's Day (my last entry date). Let's see...I got another year older and celebrated for a full straight week. We started the festivities at Power and Light in Kansas City for a night of some Irish food and dueling pianos. Then, my sweet, sweet boyfriend took me to a very nice dinner at Kansas City's number one French Restaraunt, Le Fou Frog, on the actual date of my birthday.

Since then, I've endured (and still enduring) a change of computer systems at the office and then a cancer scare. The health issues turned out to be nothing and I'm still alive and kicking. I'm still trying to balance work with this new computer system. I have work coming out of my ears and would LOVE a personal secretary at this point in my career.

I applied for college for the first time in six years. I'll be working towards my degree in Business Administration...and registration is the 18th!

Anyhow...that's a brief update. With the new face of the blog, I'll be coming back in the next day or two for a more in-depth blog entry. But, I'm keeping you all up to date. Stay tuned! Now...cut to commercial!

An Ode to My Family...

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Mon, 22 Jun 2009 02:00:00 +0000

Since it's Father's Day...and since I'm feeling a bit nostalgic, I'm going to do a blog entry about my family. We've been through a lot over the years. However, I don't think I could ask for a different life. I have very fond memories of my childhood involving my parents, grandparents, and siblings. In fact, I have memories from the time I was about two years old. My earliest memory would be having to wave out the window every day when my dad drove off for work. At this point, I had to have been about two. The only explanation I would have for remembering this far back was that it was something I did nearly every day and the repition probably helped me remember.

Since my Dad is the man of the hour today, we'll start with him. I believe myself to have been a Daddy's girl from the start. It's a fact that girls are closer to the father and boys are closer to the mother. When it comes to my brother and I, I believe that pattern to be true. I remember my dad teaching me songs to sing at church with him and his general dedication to the ministry. Having a dad who is a Children's Pastor is probably one of the funnest lives to lead as a kid. Dad always knew the newest songs and coolest games. I remember many times when Dad would try his new finds on my brother and I as kids. This was probably to ensure the children at church would enjoy them. We thought of dad as magic. I mean, the man could remove his thumb and reattach it (a trick I have yet to perfect). When I went off to school, dad was helpful in walking me to the bus stop during bitter winter days and having me climb into his snow suit to stay warm. When the bus came, I'd simply climb out (still all toasty) and be off to school. I remember the day my dad told me that he and my mom were getting divorced. I know he probably thought I was crazy for the way I reacted with a matter-of-fact "okay" and a skip out of the room. At around 9 years old, I knew what was going on and was firm in not letting it affect me. My fondest memories of my dad happened after this point. My brother and I began to be able to spend quality time with dad including trips to a local indoor zoo, Saved by the Bell telethons with macaroni and cheese lunch. There were three things my dad was good at. That was macaroni and cheese, grilled cheese sandwiches, and do-it-yourself personal pan pizza (with hamburger buns). Even today, I find my dad to not be only a great father, but a wonderful friend. My dad and I understand each other and are a lot a like in many ways. I'm proud of that. People could try to put down my mannerisms all day long. But if they are like Dad's, I'm happy. From Dad I learned the importance of ministry and how much more fulfilled your life is when you help others.

My Mom, on the other hand, was a keen combination of disciplinarian and nurturer. When I was sick, she's the one that would quickly come to my aid. In my early childhood, my mom worked outside of the home. However later on, she started a home daycare. It is here that I learned to become great with children. My favorite thing to do was to help with the kids (and hold the babies). I'm sure I turned my mother's hair grey throughout my adolescent years. Mostly because I was (and always have been) very independent. Because of my mother's nurturing ways, she had a hard time sitting back and watch me suffer. She learned to let go mostly because I didn't give her much of a chance. I do remember my daily need for her to kiss me goodbye before she left for work. If she dared to leave the house without waking me up to tell me goodbye, I'd be incredibly upset. She also learned very quickly, however, that I'm not good at remembering things in the morning. Her verbal list of chores would often go undone because I was simply too asleep to hear and remember. She soon outsmarted me and started writing it all down. Because of her, I now scrub my floors on my hands and knees (it cleans better).

My grandparents were cornerstones of my family. My Papa and Grandma were people I spent most of my life with. I'm very close to them even to this day. Papa pastored our church all throughout my youth. I remember having to walk with him to the back of the church when he dismissed to help him shake hands with the different parishoners of the church. From him, I learned how to interact with church people...and to this day take joy in shaking hands with the many people I come in contact with in a church setting. I was most certainly a social butterfly in our church and counted many of the members family. My Grandma taught me to love girly things. I loved to sit at her vanity and play with her makeup, jewelry, hair accessories, and perfume. My grandparents often took me with them on vacations including my first trip to the beach and Disney when they took me to Florida. I remember the first time I preached in front of them...my Papa was beaming ear to ear. I can't tell you how wonderful that smile of pride was to me!

My Grandma Bev and Grandpa Bob lived away for a bit in my life. However, when they moved to Saint Joe, I spent lots of time with them as well. Grandma Bev taught me how to cook. She often let me help her with her baking and I always licked the spoons! She is also the person responsible for my love for coffee (she'd let me have some when mom and dad wasn't looking). Grandpa Bob was always good for a game or two. We'd play scrabble with him all the the time. He's a pro at scrabble and so we never won. Until recently, however, when I finally beat him at his own game!

All these wonderful people taught me things that are priceless to how I live now. If it hadn't been for my family, there would be no way I could have accomplished what I have to this point. I'm thankful today for who I am and who they are. I could not think of a group of people more deserving of an ode...or my praise. They are, indeed, treasures!

Lesson Learned...

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 01:52:00 +0000

Here we are at the end of a very long day. The first of the days have really flown as I have been in the middle of a training project at work. Work has definitely been crazy! The last month or so has been difficult all the way around. Steve and I both had to be gone and were extremely busy! It was a stress on the relationship...but something that ultimately was resolved.

Over the weekend we went to a Jazz club in Kansas City called The Blue Room. It was wonderful...and extremely relaxing. Before that we had dinner at Genghis Kahn. I realized I didn't eat nearly as much as a person really should at that place. I guess I really can't complain about that...but I would've like to get my money's worth.

Saturday we went to the Royals vs. Reds game and purchased tickets for this Saturday's Royals vs. Cardinals game. Of course, all that was available was standing room only tickets. We figure if we get their when the gates open, we'll get a seat at one of the tables in the Rivals club. At least then we'll have a place to rest our rears.

I came home this afternoon and relaxed in the pool and found my way back to my favorite chair for a blogging session. The movie "Before Sunrise" is playing. Lovely movie. But it makes me think...if this blog were a movie, what songs would be on the soundtrack? I'll leave this to you! My new project for myself is to compile songs for my life. As a reader, I think you should put your two cents in. Go ahead...give me some ideas. I'll start us off...

"Lesson Learned" Alicia Keys
He broke a heart
And now it's raining
Just to rub it in
I'm at your door
I feel so crazy about it
You'll say I told you so
You saw it long ago
You knew he had to go
I finally came 'round
I'm back on solid ground
Can't let it get me down

It's alright
It's alright
It's alright

Yes I was burned but I called it a lesson learned
Mistake overturned
So I call it a lesson learned
My soul has returned
So I call it a lesson learned
Another lesson learned

Sometimes
Some lies
Can take a minute
To fully realize
His tears
Your eyes
Thirty seconds to apologize
You give it one more chance
Just like the time before
But he already know you'd give a hundred more
Until that night in bed
You wake up in a sweat
You're racing to the door
Can't take it anymore

I was burned but I called it a lesson learned
Mistake overturned
So I call it a lesson learned
My soul has returned
So I call it a lesson learned
Another lesson learned

Life perfect
Ain't perfect
If you don't know what the struggle's for
Falling down ain't falling down
If you don't cry when you hit the floor
It's called the past cause I'm getting past
And I ain't nothing like I was before
You ought to see me now

Yes I was burned but I called it a lesson learned
Mistake overturned
So I call it a lesson learned
My soul has returned
So I call it a lesson learned
Another lesson learned

Yes I was burned but I called it a lesson learned
Mistake overturned
So I call it a lesson learned
My soul has returned
So I call it a lesson learned
Another lesson learned

The Bachelorette Recap: Jillian Harris Episode 4...

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Mon, 08 Jun 2009 23:53:00 +0000

So here we are again...another week of Canadian Jillian's weird taste in men. Apparently (according to last week's episode), someone might have a girlfriend back home. I did hear somewhere that Juan is Morman..which may account for why he is so quiet, reserved, and doesn't drink. This week we have the 2 on 1 date where only one man is standing after the date. We find out everyone is going to Vancouver, Canada (Jillian's Hometown). This is a bit different from other seasons. Most don't take anyone to their hometown...at least not until the final ones. Starting out in Vancouver...and I LOVE Jillian's dress. I could see myself wearing that one. The guys check out their room...which is a step up from the bunkhouse.

Juan is hoping for a one on one date this time around. They open up the date card to reveal that Kiptyn will be going on the solo date. I'm thinking Kiptyn will make it at least to the final 3.

Jillian arrives at their date in the same jacket we always see her wearing. She takes Kiptyn kayaking to the market. The race to the bridge and Kiptyn is obviously letting her win. Until the end when he finally pulls forward. He claims his kayak wants to be near her to steak a kiss and I'm thinking he's cheesy. They go through the market to shop for dinner. They seem like a very "real" couple and I believe Kiptyn might be growing on me. They decide to feed the birds and then leave the market to go to Jillian's place and make dinner. It was apparent that she was enjoying her time with Kiptyn. All of a sudden, Kiptyn reveals his flaws which happens to be his inability to pursue a girl in relationships. I think, however, he has learned to pursue at the proper pace...instead of pulling out his guitar like Wes every 3 seconds and singing the same line of a song he'd written over and over.

The date card arrives and it belongs to Jesse, Tanner, Jake, Robby, Wes, Ed, Michael, Reid, Juan, and David. That means Mark and Mike are left for the two on ones later. My guess here is that Mark will be going home...and even Juan calls it.

Back with Kiptyn and Jillian, she pulls out the rose. It's obvious she is going to give it to him...and I'm glad. He deserves that thing putting up with a house of catty, partially homosexual men. She even does the "girly giddy" dance when he leaves...she definitely likes him. I speak from experience...I've done that dance!

Then we're off to our group date where Jillian has the guys curling. I've never done that before...but it looks like a lot of fun. Everyone was flopping around on the icy ground. Juan says that curling is about "Flexibility, Balance, and Touch...and he's got all three." Ha ha!

Back at the suite, both Mark and Mike get their date cards. I'm pulling for Mike. Then at the group date where Jillian splits the guys up into teams to compete for that night's date. It's Wes, Ed, Reid and Tanner P. vs Juan, Dave, Jesse, and Jake. I'm hoping Juan's team wins...if only to see Juan and Destroyer Dave on a team together. Wes completely flops on his turn...it was hilarious! Break dancing Michael likes snuggling with Jillian. He's hilarious! Jesse puts on the serious face for the red team...which means the team I was pulling for might win! Hopefully we'll see some Juan vs. Dave drama for the night date. Michael admits that Jesse is a cool guy. Tanner P. and him have a thing going too...hmmm. So Michael is up to try to save the blue team. However...it was a loss for the Blue team and we're suddenly looking forward to some more fights between Dave and Juan! The blue team is left behind while the red team are swept away with Jillin to the rest of the night's date. The red team gets on a boat and Jillian names Jesse the day's "MVP" and everyone toasts to him. The enjoy crab and laugh about the loser blue team. Jake and Jillian go off to captain the boat.

Jillian calls Jake perfect and then he laughs like a dork. He then mentions he has a lot of flaws...I bet we'll see them. Jillian lets him know it's okay not to be perfect because she doesn't want too perfect. Suddenly he's worried...is he too perfect for Jillian? ha ha! I'm sure he'll show his flaws...if not on accident then more than likely on purpose. Jesse spends some time with Jillian. I don't find Jesse at the top of the looks list out of all the guys...but he's got a good head on his shoulders. They kiss...just like Jillian and all the other guys. In the boat, Jake is obsessing over how perfect he is...and even asks the guys if they think he's too perfect. Dave and Jillian get to spend some time together. He's putting a lot of time into telling Jillian how hot she is. It's evident that he's more shallow. He leans in for a kiss at this moment and Jillian gives him her cheek. She's slowly getting the idea that he's a bonehead. He says he's trying to kiss her because everyone else has kissed her...which she denies. David goes on to say that he thinks that Jillian really likes him and she's testing him. That just goes to show how much of an even BIGGER bonehead he is. Then it's time for the rose, and it goes to Jesse. Which, is no surprise. He was, in fact, the curling MVP.

Then comes the two on one date with Mike and Mark. Mike has the upper hand for sure. Of course, they take their helicopter ride. Mark was definitely the 3rd wheel! Even during dinner while Mike was talking, Mark was staring off into space. The guy needs to get in the game...but I think he was feeling defeated from the beginning. So on Grouse Mountain, the date gets serious. Jillian swears she doesn't have a clear-cut idea about who is going home. Are you kidding me?! I definitely can't read this girl's mind. She pulls each of the guys aside alone to chat. Mark shares his past heartbreaks and gives that as a reason to have been guarded. His answers don't seem like what Jillian would want to hear...and while some may say that's good, that might be what ultimately sends him home. Jillian finally (and reluctantly) brings out the date rose knowing that the guy who doesn't get the rose will be going home tonight. Jillian gives the rose to Mark...which is probably going to be a shock to EVERYONE...even me! Mike seemed to have had the upper hand at first with a chemistry that's already been established. However, Jillian threw everyone a curveb all once again and sent him packing over Mark.

Back at the house, most of the guys were completely shocked. It's time for the rose ceremony and everyone heads off to the cocktail party. Reid is the first guy to get some time with Jillian. He divulges that she would have a different idea of who the guys are when they are not around her. I believe Reid is trying to throw Wes under the bus...which really needs to happen. Wes totes Jillian off on his back. She thanks him for the song and says no girl wouldn't want a song of her own. The guys are all slamming Wes and talk about the fact that he has bragged about having more than one girl while he's telling Jill he has never cheated before. Jillian divulges that she could see herself falling in love with him...that she feels comfortable with him. Jake and Jillian head off to talk. Jake lets her know he was discouraged by her comments of him being too perfect and that he was being himself. Jake says, "Be careful who you let go home." Coming from him, this opinion of his might hold some water. Juan comes in to steal Jill away in classic "Juan style." Tanner P. talks with Jake about some of the other guys who act differently around her. He says he's going to reveal that to Jillian tonight. He finds her and they head off to talk and he tells her that she needs to know about some of the guys. He reveals that one of the guys says they have a girlfriend back at home but he doesn't divulge the name which frustrates Jillian to the point that she cancels the rest of the cocktail party. At this point, I honestly think she has lost her mind. If a person doesn't know who is lying, you'd think that she'd want to talk more to uncover the truth. Instead, she's cutting right to the rose ceremony where the chances of her sending home the wrong guy is going to be that much higher.

Jillian is so angry they actually have to bleep her! She sits down with Chris Harrison to talk about the issues. Chris promises that before another rose is handed out, they will get to the bottom of it. The question is, how are they going to do that? What if no one comes forward? Jillian and Chris go confront the guys at the rose ceremony. Chris asks the guys to get it out in the open and they all look around like a bunch of dorks. Jake speaks up and asks the guy who is messing around to step up. Still...silence. Tanner P. swallows hard and Jesse tries to prod someone out in the open. Everyone starts blurting out that it's not them. Dave tries to urge the info out of Jillian to figure out who said it in the first place and she refuses. So Dave tries to get her to send home the person who said it. No one really comes clean and Jillian is obviously not ready to give a rose since nothing has been revealed.

Chris says "Thanks for being open and honest with us." I laughed...because no one could've been THAT open if we are still without answers. Knowing that Jesse, Mark and Kiptyn already have roses...

Reid (the quiet one)
Robby (the angry one...since he didn't get any one on one time)
Ed (kind of mysterious)
Michael (the break dancing dork)
Wes (the country western singing wannabe with a girlfriend at home)
Jake (the cute one)

At this point, I'm hoping Dave goes home. It's down to him, Tanner P, or Juan.

The last rose goes to...

Tanner P.

Which mean arch rivals Juan and Dave go home. There goes all the drama! Juan is shocked...and I am a little too. Though, he's creepishly quiet which might've led her to believe that he has a girlfriend at home. It's Dave's turn to leave and he asks her why and she said it didn't feel right. He's a little psycho...he's going to go hunt down Juan and assault him...it'll be in headlines tomorrow, I'm sure. She announces that they are going to Whistler. I don't even know where that is!

From the looks of next week, they will still be talking about the whole girlfriend thing and Jillian ends up crying at some point. Oh well, pretty good drama going at the end. I like that...more next week!

Bachelorette: Jillian Harris Episode 3...

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Mon, 01 Jun 2009 23:50:00 +0000

Here we are for week three of the Bachelorette! I must say, I've done some media reading and some blog readings and they are all basically saying the same thing I am...just in a meaner way. I'd like to think I'm the voice of reason for our dear, Jillian. The famous "Reality Steve" likes to tell it like it is. He is known for his blogging about reality shows...and his writing on the Bachelor and Bachelorette shows is most popular. He called the fiasco in Jason Mesnick's season long before anyone else knew about it...he definitely has an insider take. Of course, he isn't too popular with Canadians now. I've noticed my own statistics have increased for hits from people tuning in from Canada. Hello my Canadian friends! Then People Magazine said about Jillian "Cute but not gorgeous..." Um...excuse me! I think they are completely blind and need a major lesson in manners! The girl is incredibly gorgeous and anyone who says otherwise I feel would be directly downgrading MY own looks. I'm cute...but certainly not gorgeous. Jillian, on the other hand, I would rank above myself...thus being completely gorgeous. I couldn't believe I read that out of People! If anyone needs to know...this article was written by Tom Gliatto. He's either married to a supermodel or not married because he is way too shallow! Okay...off my soap box and on to the show...

I'm settled in with my ice cream and laptop in my favorite chair and hoping to have some major Bachelorette revelations tonight! Chris Harrison greets the guys in the bunkhouse. There's 3 dates this time...2 individual and one group date. The first date card reveals that Ed has the first individual dates. The pressure is one for Ed as this date determines whether he stays or goes. Of course they meet in front of ABC's choice of transportation...a helicopter. It's apparent that Jillian likes Ed. He's very cute...but we'll see if the cute lasts! They land on a very high building in downtown L.A. and Jillian reveals that they will be rip-roaring down the side of the building to the ground below.

Back at the bunkhouse, the guys are discussing whether or not Ed will get a rose. I believe these boys are a little nervous of the chemistry between Ed an Jillian. I'm not buying it for a second. There will either be some sort of revelation that causes Jillian to have her doubts...or...Fleiss is playing up their chemistry too much which means Ed will not be the last man standing.

So, Jillian and Ed strap themselves in and just when you think they are going to go tearing down the cord, they start at a crawl. You hold your breath thinking, "Okay...when are they going to start going down fast?" They never do...the activity really was just lowering them down a centimeter a minute. Yeah...ha! Quite the "adrenaline rush." Ed and Jillian find themselves at the pool below and go for a swim...with a little smooching here and there.

Later on they are out on yet another roof for dinner. Jillian reveals that she hasn't found any negative qualities about him. That probably won't lasts long as most people do have negative qualities and they usually come out just when you think they are completely perfect. Ed reveals that he has a hard time balancing out his work and personal lives. THERE'S THE DOUBT WE'VE BEEN WAITING FOR! Jillian wants to settle down and Ed wants a hottie to come home to late at night after drinking with his buddies. At this point, I'd probably want to head for the hills. All of this discussion renders Jillian speechless to which they commence to doing the one thing that speechless people do best...making out.

Back at the bunkhouse, the guys receive the next date card. Reid, Wes, Mike, Michael, Tanner F, Mark, Brad, Robbie, Tanner P, Kiptyn, and Juan are scheduled to go on the group date.

Back on the roof, the conversation between Ed and Jillian seems a bit weird.

Jillian: "I like your eyes."

Ed: "I like YOUR eyes."

Very interesting, you two! They do make a cute couple...looks wise. Then Ed just plainly asks whether or not he's going to get a rose tonight which prompts Jillian to pick up the rose. My guess is he gets it...and he does...along with an invitation to move into her house for a while. I guess that means Wes is kicked out. This is weird...the show condones living with multiple men at various times while also dating multiple men. Way to go ABC!

So off goes Jillian with her group of 11 men. Can't say I don't find her extremely fortunate. The date ends up being in a country western movie set. Wes is going to do well here....maybe he'll pull out his guitar and sing for us...again. The men trap on their chaps and poor toesy tanner has on some animal print chaps...probably cause they know he might be a homo. Mark finds out he gets to kiss Jillian...but realizes the script has EVERYONE kissing Jillian. Michael finds out he's going to be a gay cowboy with Mike. Well, half of that equation is right. The producers must smell homo like I do. The whole ordeal was COMPLETELY cheesy! My vote for best kiss, though, goes to Robby. He was just too cute! Of course, Wes pulls Jillian to the side...AGAIN. The guy is just odd...and I hope that Jillian sees his weird vibe. Then comes they gay cowboy scene. That was probably the best scene as far as acting goes. Mostly because both men were extremely comfortable in the homo role...interesting! The group moves on to the next phase of their date which happens to be in downtown LA. This is definitely the more cosmopolitan sites of the day. Reid asks if Jillian remembers talking to him the first night. I honestly don't remember Reid before this day...but Jillian says she does. Reid feels like he's getting the short end of the stick. Probably because he's such a wallflower! He really needs to stand out. Juan comes to get him. He's so soft spoken...and it weirds me out a little too. For a minute I get bored and phase back in when the guys are getting in the hot tub. Tanner P. reveals he wants to put her feet in his mouth. What a weirdo! It's a SEASON of weirdos! The guys then spot Robby and Jillian kissing. They definitely should've picked a more private spot to smooch. Jillian brings the infamous rose back to the hot tub and gives it to Robby along with an invite to move into the house. This is Jillian's 3rd bunk buddy. The guys and Jillian settle in to watch the movie they created that day.

And bringing up the rear of the dates is Sasha. Despite his girly name, Sasha is a hot Serbian! He claims is one of the most well-rounded individuals in the house. So far, I'd probably agree. He probably has some skeletons in his closet as well. Of course, Jillian is wearing her yellow high heels again! They take off in the limo to a Museum of automobiles. Sasha says she looks like a supermodel! SEE?! He agrees with me! He needs to tell People Magazine about that. They go for a cruise in the Ferrari (is that how you spell that? I don't know my cars!). Of course, it fulfills Sasha's manly need to go fast. His name might be girly...be he certainly is not! I hope this guy gets the rose tonight! Sasha reveals his history with car accidents AFTER they go on a crazy joy ride. Good move...save it for after you put the poor girl's life in danger. I couldn't ride in a car with Sasha...that would be his one vice for me! He and Jillian talk about love for a while which instantly prompts my next blog entry.

Wes sings the song he wrote for Jillian but prefaces it with "I wrote this for A girl." Other guys question Wes's intentions and why he keeps pulling out that annoying guitar! I think he is definitely a wannabe country western star. Jillian brings the rose back to Sasha. Of course, the scary music begins and I start to doubt he will get the rose. And he doesn't. I find Jillian a bit crazy now. The guy has a good head on his shoulders, wants a family, and wants love. Jillian reveals that his lack of experience in love will be the thing that prompts her not to give him the rose. So what?! If he would've been in love in the past, there is a HUGE chance he wouldn't have been on this show. What a cop out! I'm not knockin' on Jillian because she's Canadian...now I'm just doing it because that was the DUMBEST REASON I've EVER heard for breaking up with someone. Of course, the other guys are happy about that. It's apparent Jillian is going to be ending up with a weirdo...for sure.

Wes sneaks up to Jillian's house to sing her the rest of his song. This is the millionth time I've seen Wes with his guitar. By this time...I'm about ready to throw up. "They say that love...it don't come easy." I've heard that ONE line a bazillion times! Can he come up with anything else? Apparently, Jillian digs Wes's wacko nature because they make out and cuddle and then he plays it again...with yet the same line I've also heard for a bazillion times! Oh...I heard another different line...FINALLY! He wrote a song with two lines! WHAT TALENT!

Now we're at the rose ceremony and the pressure is on. I'm thinking that Brad goes home tonight. That's the only one I can call at this point. I'm hoping the rest of the show goes fast because Jon and Kate Plus 8 is on...and I wanna see some more depressing marital problems. Reid questions Jillian's decision at giving Robby the rose instead of him. That's an odd position to place the poor girl in. Reid and Jillian have their first kiss. At this point, I'm liking Reid as well. Jillian comes out and grabs Dave who is actually in some great need of anger management. Juan makes a smooth move and comes to interrupt Dave's time. I think he was doing this to get a reaction from Dave to no avail. It's obvious that Juan is trying to fuel the fire with Dave and have him show his violent nature in front of Jillian. But now I'm finding both equally annoying. They are more focused on each other than they are on Jillian! Juan tries to teach Jillian spanish. Tanner P. is so focused on feet that he actually mentions wanting to suck on her toes. This guy is a major perv in the weirdest way possible! He gives his impression of how he would suck on Jillian's toes...and I'm beginning to think he's a little LD.

Dave starts to snap yet again. I'm wondering when this guy is going to pull out his nine and bust a cap in Juan. Brad divulges to Jillian that Dave is a bit scary...and probably a bit psycho. Dave begins pinning everyone against Juan. I'm really getting sick of hearing so much about Juan! FOR REAL! Juan overhears the conversation and Dave says, "We're talking about you. Go back inside." So Juan does. How degrading! Kiptyn gets his 15 minutes this show and Jillian questions why he's always been the heart breaker. They kiss. Jillian must like kissing. She's kissed practically every guy so far on this show! Good grief. Dave keeps going about his Juan obsession. Juan comes back out and Dave tells him to go inside again. Instead, this time, he walks out and says his peace. Apparently, Dave thinks Juan has to care what he thinks. At this point, I don't believe Dave has a legitimate reason to hate Juan so much. So he didn't take a shot. Who cares?! Dave divulges he wants to kill Juan. At this point, I'm thinking Juan needs to get a restraining order! Chris Harrison enters and breaks up the party just as someone is about to let Jillian know about the drama. I really don't think she gets the full picture of what goes on when she's not around. Hopefully her gut instinct will kick in and she'll send the right people home instead of pulling another Sasha mistake.

Chris and Jillian starts talking about Juan. She mentions he's a little more "calculated." She mentions he seems stressed out about it. Apparently, she doesn't know about big, bad Dave threatening his life. I'd be stressed out too! If Dave leaves the house, I believe Juan would be a little easier to peg and a little more at ease. Though, I believe he brought it on himself when he interrupted Jillian's time with Dave when he KNEW Dave hated him.

And here we are...the roses go to:

Remembering Robby and Ed already have roses...

Jake who hasn't gotten much air time.

Reid

Mark

Jesse another who didn't get much air time this show.

Tanner P our friendly foot fetish freak

Wes our cowboy wannabe

Juan who is hated by Dave...to the point of murder.

Michael who is Tanner P's lover and also a fan of peeing himself.

Kiptyn who has the cool name but hasn't been shown much.

Mike who still thinks Jillian is a "great catch"

Who will the last one go to? Brad? Dave? Neither?

David! He gets the last rose. Which means he's around for one more week of torturous murder threats towards Juan. I hope Juan keeps one eye open in the bunks tonight!

So Tanner F. goes home tonight. He was really in the shadow of the infamous Tanner P. It was apparent she couldn't keep them both around. She definitely kept the most interesting. Then Brad goes home. I knew this from the get-go. He's lucky he made it this far, honesty. He's SOOO gotta be on the geek squad!

So now we can all sleep soundly. Next week, the guys go to Vancouver. It looks like next week will be dramatic...talk of some of the men having girlfriends at home. I'm thinking Wes or Juan could hold that card. However, what motivation would Juan have to be on this show with a girlfriend back home? I'd think the country singer would have more of a reason to get on a show and already be in a relationship. I mean...promotion, right?

Okay...till next week. That's all I got for right now. If I had to choose a final 3 right now, I'd say Reid, Ed, and Kiptyn. We'll see...that's just a guess.

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Thu, 28 May 2009 04:36:00 +0000

Memorial Day...Away on Holiday....

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Wed, 27 May 2009 01:46:00 +0000

Tuesday, May 26th, 2009

Friday started off the long weekend right! Steve and I took off for a weekend getaway to Saint Louis, Missouri. First, I had to wait for Steve's school to let out. So, as I was waiting at his house, I packed his bags for him. I did this for a few reasons...first of all, Steve has a reputation for running late. We wanted to leave at 3 p.m. and by 1:30 p.m., he was still not on his way back from school. Not to mention the fact that we still needed to stop by Champs to exchange the jersey he got me for a smaller size. I was pretty psyched about wearing it. I found the gift extremely sweet!

Once he finally got home, I think he was pretty happy to see all his stuff was packed for him. We loaded up the car and headed for Independence Center for a quick shopping trip to exchange my jersey and get his friend a birthday gift. We also got a quick bite to eat an an Orange Julius (which I'm craving right now...now that I'm thinking about it). We arrived in Saint Louis at about 9 p.m. at his friend's restaurant "Trattoria Giuseppe." Which, I would definitely recommend. His friend JP's family owned the restaurant and I got to sample some really great authentic Italian food. We celebrated JP's birthday and then went on our way to meet Steve's other friends at their apartment in downtown Saint Louis.

I wasn't really sure what to expect about where we'd be lodging. At about midnight, we were driving around Saint Louis completely loss and seemingly in the ghetto. Once we got ahold of his OTHER friend JP, we found our way to the very posh apartment. We were giddy when we arrived because the place was BEAUTIFUL. It seemed like such a genuine vacation! The next morning we were up early and discovered the beautiful scene from their balcony.

We jetted off on the metro train to Busch Stadium for the Cardinals vs. Royals game. The girls were Cards fans and the boys were the Royals fans...and we dressed accordingly. The other couple with us definitely took their rivalry way more seriously. I don't believe Steve and I have ever fought about our baseball teams...but it's sort of fun to razz each other about it. It was my first time seeing a Cards home game! Then, in the 4th inning, we began holding up signs with our hometowns on them. We must've seemed like a fun group because suddenly we were on the big screen decked out in our team gear. That was a first for me.

That night we headed off to the horse races somewhere in the middle of Illinois. I'd never been to the horse races before. I was pretty taken by the beautiful horses and their incredible speeds! Not to mention, they had the funniest names. My favorite was "I Don't Think So."

I wasn't really sure what to expect once I got there. I was thinking more along the lines of the Kentucky Derby. However, I quickly realized, this was almost like a Nascar race! I met some pretty interesting people and sat in on a conversation with a couple who had met on the internet and heard the guy explain to the woman he was with why he only wanted to see her when he called her. I looked back to realize she was hanging all over him. I was half tempted to coach her a little..."Walk away honey...he's just not that into you!" I enjoyed the food A LOT. Actually, I did that all weekend and came back a few pounds heavier than I left! We enjoyed some time snacking on the patio that night and watching people drive in and out of McDonalds. It was a nice night.

Sunday morning we got lost again on our way to Twin Rivers Worship Center. However, once we got there, all was well. It was Steve's first experience in a Church of God. One of my brothers was also in town with his girlfriend so we sat with them during the service. Steve and I both enjoyed the service...this is another place I would HIGHLY recommend if you are looking for a place to worship on your stay in Saint Louis. You can find them on www.trwc.com.

Then we jetted off to the next Cardinals vs. Royals game. We made it in time to see the Royals batting practice and Steve was extremely excited when he caught a ball and got it signed by Soria. He was pretty proud of that ball. I'm not sure how many home runs I dodged, but I thought for sure I was going to get knocked out by a ball at some point that day.

After that, we headed back to the apartment. I was exhausted and Steve needed to finish some homework for one of his master's classes. Afterwards, we had dinner at a place called Toms and some frozen custard. Now do you see what I mean by how much we ate?! I felt like a huge marshmallow!

Unfortunately, we had to leave Monday morning to make our way to Salisbury, MO to watch Steve coach his high school baseball team. They won 9-0 and will progress in districts to see if they can get to state. It was a great game. We finally got back home Monday evening and then I was back to work this morning...and exhausted.

The good news is, I got my car back today plus one motor! I was told that the motor was found in a salvage yard but in good shape and with less miles than what my car had before the flood. After talking to the insurance company, I was told the motor is guaranteed for as long as I owned the car. I'm pretty happy about that. PLUS...I was needed to get my car detailed and the insurance took care of that too. I'm pretty happy. Hopefully the car continues to work. I'm just happy to have some wheels.

That was it for the weekend. Steve and I have a Royals game on Friday and he meets my mom and step dad on Saturday. We'll see how that all works out. All in all, it was a great weekend. Despite having so much time we Steve, we didn't kill each other. Oh...we definitely had our arguments especially when we were lost...but I believe the trip made us that much stronger. It was a good time...can't wait till my next road trip!

Bachelorette: Jillian Harris Episode 2 "Where in the World is

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Tue, 26 May 2009 00:07:00 +0000

So here we are again on the second episode of the Bachelorette with Jillian Harris. We start off by seeing our dear Canadian sweetheart sitting out in the sun. Her first quote was, "I'm not a skinny model..." and then they show her in a itty bitty bikini. Um...I don't exactly look like that. She's nuts!

So she invites 8 of the guys over for a pool party and ends up sneaking off with the rose for the boys to do a little bit of a hunt. Now, this is a little better than most of the past shows where the first person to stick their tongue down her throat gets the date rose. This is a bit more of a quirky way of getting the job done and easier on her to pick which fella she'd like to keep around.

The guys then turn into a bunch of screaming chicks in cars racing to get to her. Michael then says, "I peed just a little bit in my bathing suit." That's not necessarily something you probably wanna share on national television. He happened to be paired up with Tanner (the foot dude). I think they might have a thing for each other, maybe. The guys end up in a jewelry store to see necklaces that Jillian has picked out. Each team gets their pick of the one they want for her. All of a sudden, she shows up in bank vault dressed to the nines. Wes and Brad came to her rescue first. She then has to pick one which happens to be.....Wes. Of course! He's the better looking one. Brad is kinda nerdy. I actually believe I said that the last time but I don't remember. He then uses a few choice curses because he wasn't picked.

At this time, Steve is sitting here with me watching and thinks they are all a bunch of fairies. He also thinks Wes is a bit of a jerk compared to Brad. He said, "Nice guys finish last and that Brad looks like someone you could walk all over." The other guys begin to show up and Brad is there to tell them the news. Meanwhile, back at the house, another date card shows up. When it arrives all the guys say "The date card" at different times. Talk about being observant. The date is directed to Jake for a one on one.

Back at the date, Wes talks about past relationships. Apparently, past girls have had a problem with him being on the road and his "industry" which happens to be country singing. Jillian is a little hesitant but ends up giving Wes a little bit of a kiss. She divulges the fact that she falls for the bad guys (I guess alluding to the fact that she believes Wes might just be a bad guy). Now, if I were Wes, I'd be a little offended by this. He doesn't seem to be. She gives him a rose anyway. Wes gets to stay in her house (in his own bed). Whoop dee doo!

So it's Jake's turn for his date. Of course, Wes is still in her house and she kisses him goodbye to go get Jake from the boy's house. Dressed up in some red boots and a black dress, they take off in her purple convertible for their date. She takes him to a country western store to get Jake looking like a rodeo clown. Okay...maybe not a clown but definitely a bull rider. Jake likes to walk around with his shirt unbuttoned. Probably because of those washboard abs. I'm thinking he's a bit of a perv...just a bit. He decides that he's going to fall for Jillian. I'm guessing it's because he just realized his love for cheesy country western gear.

Of course, Jillian pours Jake a shot and dances on the bar. This is the Jillian I pegged; drunk Canadian who loves country western music. Jake teaches Jillian how to two-step. Nice moves...he probably googled her before the show to find out what she liked and then taught himself how to two-step for the benefit of capturing her attention. Far reach, I'm sure. I still kinda like Jake, I guess.

So then the next group date ends up being with the Harlem Globe Trotters. I didn't even know those guys were still around! For some reason, afterwards at the beach, Mike goes running into the water with his banana hammock. Apparently, this "melted Jillian's heart." I was a littler grossed out, personally.

Juan takes Jillian away to talk. Though, right before, David gets all catty because Juan poured out his shot and starts talking about tying him to a tree. This is what makes me believe that most of these men might actually be a little gay. Kiptyn gets his turn for some one on one time. He divulges that he is normally the heart breaker. Jillian skips right over this fact! I don't know...but if a guy told me he has always been the one to break things off, I'd seriously think long and hard about keeping this guy around. I mean...what's the point? The odds that he's going to skip town on you are higher than you riding off into the sunset. Mike does get the date rose...probably for his display of his man parts earlier into the day. Nice! Classy, even. Psssh!

The rose ceremony rolls around and I find myself a little jealous about how great Jillian looks in her little black dress. I'm ready to get down to brass tax as I find this episode has been a little slow and boring. Toesy Tanner grabs on Jillians feet. He says, "Dude, I love feet...feet are awesome!" Finally she realizes that Tanner's foot obsession is a bit creepy. It's about dang time! Of course, Wes and Jesse go all female and argue back and forth about whether or not Jesse is jealous of the fact that Wes gets to stay in the house. Jillian comes and grab Jesse for some one on one time and, as they are talking seriously about relationships, he begins to tell how he was offered the choice to live in Italy or come on the show and he chose the show. Italy probably would've turned out better because, I hate to make a statement this sure, but Jesse will not be the last man standing. Should've done Italy!

Wes then busts up Robby's one on one time with Jillian. Of course, he's pretty ticked about this because Wes already has a rose and didn't need one on one time. Wes asks Jillian jokingly if she's cheating on him. She looks a little disgusted by the fact that Wes is coming on a little strong. I mean, not only is he living in the same house as her, but then he's pushing way too hard to win her affection. It's not working. I fear Wes is going home soon. Not tonight, of course, because he already has a rose...but definitely soon.

Chris Harrison breaks in and lets the guys know they will be voting on the man they want to see go home. ABC must really be grasping for straws to see if they can stir up some drama. You see Tanner P's arm around Michael. He's sitting pretty close to him too. *cough* GAY! It's odd...they were partners in the race earlier in the day and I believe I pegged the gay thing from that point. Forget having the guys vote for guys they want to see go home...highlight the homosexuality going on in the house. Now THAT'S drama! David starts talking about beating up Juan again. Our dear Juan might want to get a restraining order at some point...and David might need some anger management! Brian finally speaks up. I haven't seen much of him this episode. However, he starts taking off his clothes and, suddenly, I see more of him than what I want to! They pull out the black box to cover up the whole train wreck of nudity. All the guys acted disgusted. However, something tells me that they enjoyed it more than they let on.

The results of the vote are brought in by Chris. The 3rd most hated is Julien. The 2nd is Dave. The first place winner of "Jerk of the Evening" is Juan. SHOCKING! Jillian is given a rose to either save Juan or send him home. She gives him the rose and I agree. I really don't see him being that big of a scum bag. They're obviously just jealous, catty women...I mean, men. David doesn't like this much. Juan might want to keep one eye open when he goes to sleep...since we know how violent Dave seems to be. We cut to commercial and I'm wondering where our Simon has been. You know, the guy that you can't understand. Apparently, neither could ABC because they had to put what he was saying on the screen. And we're off to find out who will be staying other than Wes, Jake, Juan, and Mike.

Another drum roll....

Jesse...he stays another day. But for how long? Would Italy have been a better choice?

David...Jillian has no idea he's really a murderer.

Ed...Probably won't be around for much longer.

Sasha...the Serbian.

Mark...not much to say about him.

Michael...Toesy Tanner's secret lover.

Tanner P...coincidence he was called right after Michael? Maybe not!

Kiptyn...still has a good name.

Reid...another guy I can't say much about.

Robby...ugh...all these guys are flying way low on the radar.

Tanner F...probably better off than Tanner P...because I think he's actually straight.

And the last rose goes to....

Brad. Unbelievable! The guy seriously has to be a member of the geek squad!

That means Julien, Brian (the naked guy), Simon (the guy who can't talk to where you can understand him), and Mathue go home. I have now changed my favorite. I think Wes is a doofus. I kind of like Mark the best. I mean, if he can keep his clothes on. We'll see what next week has in store. From the looks of it...it looks a bit cheesy.

I do like the very end where it shows the rest of the guys in the house trying to give Simon a lesson in correct pronunciation. I'm glad I'm not the only one who couldn't understand him.

The Bachelorette: Jillian Harris Part 1

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Tue, 19 May 2009 01:02:00 +0000

Here we are with Jillian Harris...Hot Dog Diva and Make-Out-On-Camera extraordinaire! She dazzled us with her grace on The Bachelor with (*cough* jerk) Jason Mesnick, just a few months ago. Of course, the show's premiere starts off showing Jillian making out hot and heavy with last season's Bachelor and then being dumped shortly after. And...of course...it shows her skipping down the city street eating a hot dog and washing her purple sports car in yellow high heels. Who thinks up this stuff anyway? It's obviously not something an average woman does...washing her car in high heels. Pssh. At least...I haven't. Maybe I should try that. However something tells me they are playing this up for all it's worth as usual!

I can't say I'm not just a little bit envious of this Canadian beauty as she sifts her way through not just 25 but 30 gorgeous men. Men who, from the looks of the previews, are just about as catty as the women you would see on The Bachelor. On second thought...maybe I'm not jealous at all. In fact, it takes a lot of effort to keep up with ONE gorgeous man (and believe me...I know...he's my "man friend").

Of course you couldn't live without Chris Harrison's brilliant and most original means of introducing each show and hosting in general (sense the sarcasm). I mean, Chris seems like he's got a good head on his shoulders. However, his annual return to the show makes me think otherwise. Can you make a career out of saying, "This is the most dramatic Bachelorette EVER" every single season?!

We start meeting all the men...and of course poor Stephen from New York picks up a hot dog with Sour Kraut. Now, if you remember the famous line of Ms. Harris from the Bachelor this past season..."If you're a kraut, you're out!" It's apparent this man might not make it very far if you base it off his general geeky nature and hot dog topping of choice. Then, Sasha. Who names their kid that?! OH wait...a guy who is Serbian! That makes more sense. I always thought Sasha was a girl's name. He is pretty...he just might be a girl! Then Wes...a country singer. PERFECT! A Canadian and a Hillbilly! So far, so boring! Then pretty man Greg...it's obvious this fitness model might think a little much of himself. I'm not sure I'm too impressed at this point. Pretty shallow...pretty nerdy men. Poor Jillian...if she only knew what she's gotten herself into!

Cut to commercial and I'm thinking there better be a whole lot more than this! Otherwise, our Jillian made a trek to survive this brutal show agayn for no good reason. Back from the commercial, Jillian sits down to talk to Chris. Honestly, she sounds a little wasted. Wait a minute...maybe that's just the Canadian accent! She quotes, "You have to slay a few dragons to find your prince!" Brings a new meaning to man-eater! Ironically, I know the feeling! She refers to the man she will end up with as "Mr. Invisible." Sounds like someone needs to warn any future men that she totally plans on outshining them...they won't be revealed...they'll remain Mr. Invisible in the light of Queen Jillian!

For a minute, I'm bored enough to switch over to the Minnesota vs. New York Yankees game. You know it's bad when a woman resorts to baseball instead of cheesy romance reality. I could talk almost as much about the baseball game as I could about the show so far. That's pretty bad. The bases are loaded for Minnesota (who I'm cheering for). It's exciting...much more exciting than ABC! I switch over to the Bachelorette to see her welcoming some men. Brian greets Jillian by calling her "Hot Tub Harris." What a way to make a great first impression...bring up a steamy make out scene in a hot tub with her ex. I didn't think you were supposed to talk about ex-boyfriends on a first date! I've heard the name "Jason" more than I have "Jillian" at this point. Do these boys bat for the other team or what?! More men exit the limo...blah, blah, blah. One can't even talk and ends up looking down at Jillian's feet saying absolutely nothing for several painfully awkward seconds. Robby the bartender seemed to catch Jillian's attention. I hear she is quite fond of Grandpa's cough medicine. Should be a match! Mathue pulls out his cowboy hat of fame to have Jillian sign. I'm kinda liking this guy...he's from Witchita, KS...pretty close to home but no where I'd wanna be. Then some British dude. You literally can't understand a word he says...and it's so bad ABC actually had to translate what he was saying at the bottom of the screen. Something about making a cup of tea. Those British...they think tea is a good means at a pick up line. Uhhh...they must be running out of top-of-the-line bachelor's! Either that, or the show's reputation has scared every man into running to the hills. Is this show really going to last two hours?!

Then Julien introduces himself. Of course, Jillian thinks he's introducing her to herself. Julien and Jillian? That's not gonna work! My buddy Kyle looks like a jacked up version of Clay Aiken and loses his way making the journey from the front fountain inside the building. Yes...I always mistake a brick wall for a door! Here's Sour Kraut Stephen again...and he managed to not look like a gigantic idiot. Of course, he didn't say very much! Juan...he greets Jillian in Spanish. Of course, she couldn't wrap her Canadian brain around that one. I'm most impressed with a dude with a Flock of Seagulls hair cut. He might be my new favorite...soul mates! Dumb Greg...he "hugs it out" with Jillian and admits to marrying 2 Canadians. He doesn't really elaborate on what that means. He either officiated the weddings or is actually Mormon looking to add to his clan of Canadian wives! Interesting...

Another commercial and it's getting more painful by the second! We're finally back and through the 25 bachelors. Chris Harrison reminds Jillian that one of those men could be her husband. Before she met these men she was saying the same thing. However, after Chris' mention of it she comments, "Easy on the 'H' word." Yeah...I think she just figured out these guys are a bunch of losers. Then begins the REAL party. You take 25 men and one gorgeous, Canadian hot dog lover and you have a recipe for disaster. She quickly takes to Jesse the wine-maker who shows of his shirt with the words "Aspiring Canadian." Listen, buddy...she's not in it for the shirt...she's in it for the alcohol. Kiptyn...I just like his name. We find out he's a ketchup guy which Jillian thinks is cute. Not sure why ketchup is cute...but whatever floats her boat.

Chris ushers in the First Impression Rose. I'm interested in seeing who gets this coveted prize of the night. I'm betting it's the "Aspiring Canadian" Jesse...but we'll see. I flip back to the Minnesota game. Praying they hit a home run...but nope...out as soon as I switch the channel. Ugh! Kyle decides to give Jillian a disguise in case she wants to go incognito. A finger mustache is a little weird...but incredibly unique. Strangely...all the guys seemed to find her new mustache even more attractive. Oh great...the country singer pulls out his guitar. It's almost like all the opera singing women on every Bachelor season. I saw her swallow hard at one point...and it wasn't because she was choked up with emotion. Unless that emotion was complete distress and nausea! Then Jillian gets a break dance lesson with Michael. This wasn't random...he's actually a dance instructor. She should've pulled out that mustache! Greg beat boxes and they battle it out on the dance floor for Jillian's affection. Mike definitely showed up Greg. Then David...our man of silence staring at her feet in the beginning actually seems a bit intriguing once he gets his nerves in check. He admits his first impressions suck...I agree!

Then Chris comes in for a special announcement..5 MORE GUYS! PRAISE GOD! Oooh...they look normal! There's your final five! Of course, Jillian nods in agreement and relief. Ed informs Jillian he is one of the "Premium Five." I agree...if those guys hadn't walked in I might've lost hope for this show. Oh wait...Tanner (one of the "premium five") can't stop talking about feet. He can't date a woman with crooked toes or low arches. And he HAS to have painted toes. Okay...maybe we only had a "Premium 4." For some reason, she finds him comforting. If only she knew she was being judged by her feet. The feet that were dried by another man and it was clear Toesy Tanner was NOT happy about this.

Aw...and she pulls out our awkward-first-impression David to give him the First Impression rose. I might actually like this guy...oddly. The overly catty guys complain that he gets more one-on-one time than them. If only they knew most of his time with Jillian remained in silence, they wouldn't feel so threatened. Ugh! Can we end this torment already? Jillian goes and deliberates who to send home with Chris. So the winning Bachelors are....

Drum roll please....

David (first impression guy), Jesse (Aspiring Canadian/Wine guy),
Jake, Wes (Country singer),
Matheu (Cowboy hat dude), Michael (Break dancing champ),
Robert, Ed (Premium Five dude),
Reid (Who the heck is this guy!?), Simon (guy no one can understand),
Kiptyn (Cool name guy), Mike ("What a catch!" guy),
Brian D., Sasha(The Girly Guy),
Julien (Jillian's name match), Tanner P. (Foot dude)
Mark, Brad (Must be from the Geek Squad),
Tanner F (One that does not have a foot fetish)

And the final rose goes too..............

JUAN! (Spanish-speaking guy)

It's obvious she likes guys she can't understand. As do most women. Kyle goes home. Darn...she might need more than just one disguise. Stephen goes home. She's right..kraut is out. Apparently, and according to him, she doesn't like "awesome guys." This gets a pretty good laugh out of me. I'm pretty pleased to see Mr. Arrogant (Greg) go home. It was probably because he thought he could break dance but really couldn't. That's got to be it!

So far, I'm really liking Tanner P. His means of finding the right woman is dead on...it's all in the feet! Plus...with that type of theory, I could probably get just about anyone! My feet are pretty cute. I like Mathue too...but more because he really is cool and not beause he has a strange foot fetish. Stay tuned next week when we see if Jillian can peg a man by more than just his hot dog topping!

A Day in the Life...

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Mon, 18 May 2009 22:13:00 +0000

Monday, May 18th, 2009

5:32 a.m. Woke up, check my alarm clock, and realized I had another hour to sleep in...and that I did.

6:25 a.m. Called Steve to wake him up. No answer.

6:26 a.m. Tried again. No answer.

6:32 a.m. Tried again and, obviously, the 3rd time is the charm. Chatted with Steve about plans for the day and bid him a good day.

7:15 a.m. Was picked up by my mother and taken to the Auto Medics to check in my car.

7:30 a.m. Walked next door to the office and started my very busy day. I delegated various tasks including some spring cleaning.

10:30 a.m. Was called by mechanic to be told my motor was shot and that the cost could total $5,000. I immediately called my insurance company and filed a claim.

1:45 p.m. Was called back by the insurance company and told an inspector would be out to look at my car tomorrow. One of two things will happen...they will either deem it a "total loss" and I'll get a new car OR they will pay for the repairs (other than the $500 deductible). I'm praying for the first choice.

4:00 p.m. Was picked up from work by my mother, made the office deposit, and arrived home.

Now, 5:17 p.m. in my favorite chair with a clean house. I'm pretty pleased with the fact that the place is spotless and I can go on to read my books. I'm currently working on Nicholas Sparks' "The Choice." I had planned on starting the Shopaholic series first, however I received this book around Christmas from a friend and the note seemed to indicate that this book might relate to me in some way. Even if it doesn't, I'm happy to be reading again. Tonight is the first part of the finale of Dancing with the Stars and the premiere of "The Bachelorette" with the past Bachelor's Jillian. I'm pretty excited about this season because Jillian happened to be my second favorite girl on the show (Melissa was the first...and now I'm cheering for her on Dancing with the Stars). I'll try to share my thoughts on this season's bachelorette as I usually have very intuitive things to say about it. That, or humorous things...either way.

I did want to point your attention to the area below each blog entry. You can help me know what entries you like by casting your vote if you find the entry funny or interesting. Until my weigh in on The Bachelorette...I will assume the position of the night...

Even When the Rain Falls...Even When the Flood Starts Rising...

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Mon, 18 May 2009 00:22:00 +0000

Sunday, May 17th, 2009

I believe God looked down on me this weekend and said, "Let's give her something to write about!" The weekend started out in a very strange fashion. Friday came along and I was looking forward to spending some time with Steve and meeting his parents. I had planned to make most of my errands on Friday after work and even offered to help my cousin finalize plans to enroll her baby in daycare. Before making my way there, I stopped by to see mom at work and pick up a fundraising envelope for the MDA (you'll get to know more about that this week). While we were there, a storm blew in and delayed our plans to leave. Once we thought the rain had let up enough, we set out to make our runs. First, I had to stop at the bank and make the final deposit for work and had my cousin following behind me the whole way. I made my way south towards the church and decided to detour through Starbucks. The next few hours would quickly change the rest of my day...my weekend...and now, my week. Now, understanding we were in the middle of town on the main road where there are no large bodies of water any where near. I made my way into the parking lot and to the other side when I looked over and saw a huge puddle of water near some of their trees. I remembered thinking, "Wow! That's a big puddle!" Then...all of a sudden and without warning, my car stopped. I looked out the driver's side window to see a puff of smoke. I was confused about what just happened until I looked to the ground outside of my window and realized I was in foot deep water. Completely confused I looked around to see where the lake had come from. It was almost like one of those really weird dreams where things are present in a scene where they really do not belong...like a toilet in the middle of an intersection. My cousin was no longer in the car behind me but in the parking lot beside Starbucks. I had no idea what to do and it was obvious my car wasn't going anywhere. I saw a car begin to make the same jouney into the water and rolled down my window to wave them away...there was no reason for two cars to be in the same pool! They quickly saw my situation and went around to the other side of the parking lot. All of a sudden a swarm of people were around the car snapping pictures with me still inside. I was COMPLETELY mortified! I picked up my phone and frantically dialed my mother's number. I wasn't sure what she was going to do for me but I figured that I needed some major support in this crisis...especially since none of the Starbucks employees bothered to get out and help me. I was frantically yelling into the phone trying to explain my situation...and I was far from being level-headed. I rolled down the window to see how high the water was and, at the time, was relieved no water was inside the car. I continued talking to mom and in the middle of the conversation, I realized my feet were a bit wet. I looked down in the floorboard to see water coming in very quickly which led me to quickly pulling my feet and legs up into the seat to prevent getting anymore wet than I had to. My mom said she was on her way and I gathered my things to try to make the climb out of the car. I rolled up my pants and took off my boots and quickly tip toed my way to dry land. I looked at my car astonished at what just happened and bewildered about how so much water could get into such a large area of parking lot in the middle of town. I made my way into Starbucks and someone got me a towel (as it was pouring rain). I dried off as much as I could and made my way outside to see my mom had arrived with one of her coworkers. We sat in her van and awaited a tow to arrive watching truck after truck take the same trip and make it through(because their vehicles were farther off the ground). At each vehicles passing, the wake of the water washed up the side of my car and I winced everytime. It then got much worse when a semi truck decided to make his way out that part of the parking lot (instead of going out the other exit) and sending an even larger wake of water up the side of my car. Still waiting a while later, we noticed an empty cup spinning in the middle of the water. It's then we realized that there was a drain there not drain draining out the water. A truck came by and asked if we needed any help and one of the customers asked the man if he could reach down and see if there was anything under the spinning cup. Mind you, this whole time, the employees at Starbucks did absolutely nothing for me. None of them asked me if I was okay or if there was anything they could do. I was very disappointed as I make regular trips to Starbucks several times a week. The man in the truck reached down and began pulling up gobs of trash and grass and within 5 minutes every drop of water was drained away. This made me SO angry knowing that if Starbucks would've cleaned out their drain on a regular basis, I wouldn't have dealt with such a problem. My car, of course, would not start once the water was gone and the same man helped me pushed my car to the back of the parking lot. I cancelled the tow after realizing it might take several hours to get assistance and the car might work after a few days of drying. So...I remain carless...and indefinitely so because my car still would not start this morning after two days to dry out. I'm praying it's a simple fix. I did not make a Starbucks run this morning...and may never to that particular store. I was very disappointed but grateful to the good customers there for their help in my time of need.

I called Steve immediately after this all took place and he quickly made his way to come and get me even leaving his baseball practice. I was pretty happy to see him...he has a way of making me feel like everything is fine even when my car is soaked in the Starbuck's parking lot. Which, I found it ironic that out of all places in this town, my car would end up in my very favorite place...flooded.

Steve then took me around town to run my errands...including a much needed haircut. Afterwards, he helped me pick a new blouse and we made our way back out to his car. I opened the door and saw something in the seat. I reached in to move it but stopped to process exactly what it was...a Cardinal's jersey. My thoughts were a little slow from the earlier situation of the day and I quickly had the thought, "Why does he have a Cardinal's jersey? He hates the Cardinals!" I turned around and looked at him and then put two and two together, "You got me a Cardinal's Jersey?!" He nodded looking very pleased with himself...and pleased with my huge smile that replaced my very serious face! It was such a sweet gesture of him after my incredibly bad day. We sat down to dinner at Wiskey Creek and recounted the happenings of the day. My phone rang and I picked up to hear my mom laughing, "Your car is on TV!" My jaw dropped...I didn't remember seeing a news crew present during the whole situation. What was the most humorous, though was the news showed a video of my car and said, "And this car was caught in water in the Starbucks parking lot." I was again completely embarassed! However, if my car should get flooded anywhere...it should be in a place I frequent often and love. My car was famous and I was one of those dumb people you see on television crawling on to the roof of their car in a huge flood and being lifted away by helicopter. Okay...maybe not THAT dramatic...but it sure felt like it! I spent the rest of the evening helping Steve grade papers from school and watching movies. He was the happy ending to my disaster of the day!

Saturday got a little better as Steve and I made our way to Home Depot to get the paint we'd picked out for his house. Getting to this point was big because I think he was afraid of me "girling" it up. However, I believe I helped him pick some very masculine colors for his place. We also stopped by Party America to see if they carried anything I can use for the youth camp I'll be doing in Arkansas next month. We got a little sidetracked after I found an umbrella that looks like the mini ones you'd put in a tropical drink. I decided to pose for a picture.

We also had to stop off at the store so I could get a gift for his parents since I was meeting them for the first time. I was pretty picky about the gift because I wanted to make a good impression. However, it seemed like no arrangement was good enough for the occassion. So, I picked out a lilly and some filler flowers along with a vase and quickly made my own arrangement in Steve's car on the way back to his house. We painted for a couple of hours and got a little done before it was time to wisk off to his parent's house. I was a little nervous about what would take place once I got there. I feel a bit out of place in the presence of people I've never met. I felt like I had to entertain...or like I was the center of everyone's attention. I was welcomed warmly at the door and presented my little arrangement which Steve's mom placed on the dining room table. She ushered me to her back yard to show me her garden and their beautiful in-ground pool. It was lovely. We had dinner and was then taken on a tour through the house to see many pictures proudly hung of Steve when he was younger. I was then taken downstairs by his mother and quickly became very jealous of her pieces of art. We had plenty of things in common...including our love for chocolate and the color red. She started showing me all of these blankets she'd knitted and they were the most elaborate ones I'd ever seen. I loved them! She offered to teach me and I'm hoping that I'll get to learn...it was apparent that she was incredibly talented! In fact, she even offered to take a look at a pattern I'd been eyeing and make it for me. That was probably my favorite part of the night. We had dessert together and decided that his parents were amazing people. His mother was sweet and had a very fun personality. His dad was a lot like him and very laid back despite our active chatting. We left to make some plans on a ball game his parents gifted us tickets to and an idea to attend Worlds of Fun together (a local amusement park). His dad likes roller coasters a lot like him and his mother despises them...a lot like me.

The time with his parents was a glimpse into his life outside of how I know him...and I was impressed and comfortable. I shouldn't have been surprised...his personality and character reflected that of his parents. His help this weekend made it much easier to deal with the activities of the weekend. It's wonderful to have someone so dependable in my life. I think we both help each other in so many ways...and it's obvious that our relationship together gets more accomplished than our lives apart. While we have no plans to take this relationship into any more serious levels at the present time, we're enjoying each other's company. If only other people could understand that 6 months isn't long enough for the two of us to make huge, life-altering decisions. It's going to be a very long time before any of that happens. Even when the flood rises...I come out with a hair cut, a new Cardinals jersey, and a wonderful, incredible boyfriend. I'm sure not many flood victim's can't say that!

The Beat Goes On...

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Thu, 14 May 2009 03:24:00 +0000

Wednesday, May 13th, 2009 at 10:25 p.m.

I have not been able to fight perpetual exhaustion today. Despite my best attempts, the last couple of days have left me in a state of total incoherance. In fact, yesterday morning during my morning conversation with Steve I actually uttered, "I got a bigger ball for my pen." He questioned my reasoning behind that statement since it had absolutely nothing to do with anything we were talking about. Oddly enough, I actually felt like there was something important about that statement but had no idea what it was. Pens are not of great importance...so who knows? It did provide me some mid-morning entertainment when I remembered the conversation and then laughed about it.

I spent my day today keeping up with my daily tasks. Lately, that has been pretty easy. Work has slowed down a bit and I've actually been able to leave a little early on a few occssions this week. That rarely happens. I attended a Blue Cross and Blue Shield seminar today that had me falling asleep in the front row of the conference room. It really wasn't as helpful as I was hoping. Oh well. I'm used to my annual Medicare seminars which have me leaving feeling well informed as well as entertained. That gig is all day and I never get bored. An hour and a half of this seminar today had me wishing I brought some caffiene pills!

I had the kids at church help me make up decorations for the youth camp I'm guest speaker at. THe theme is "God Rocks" so I had them decorate mini guitars. They really liked the project and they all ended up look really great and creative! I returned home to find myself obsessed with some spots on my legs. I'm going to need to get them checked out...they look very similar to basal cell carcinoma. Which is probably the least detrimental out of all the forms of skin cancer a person could have. Nonetheless, I'm still concerned. Hopefully I'm not up all night thinking about skin cancer. It must be all that Izzy stuff on Grey's Anatomy!

The weekend is closer now and I'm facing the famous "meeting of the parents." I'm not much for this as the only people attending will be Steve and I and his parents. This means that I'll be in the spotlight and I'm a better wallflower. I'm a bit shy at first (I know...shocker) but after I get to know the group, can be the life of the party. I feel uncomfortable around people I don't know well...and crowds. It's my social anxiety. The only difference is, I generally feel like punching people in crowds and hiding from small groupings of people I don't know. I'm coming to the conclusion that I'm stranger than I originally thought.

Well, that's all I can come up with for now. I'm about to fall asleep in my favorite chair. I need to take my last call and crawl into my comfy bed. Grey's Anatomy finale is tomorrow which makes me pretty excited...and it's pay day. I don't think you could have a better Thursday. That, and my fingers are telling me it's time for a manicure. I'll spend another glorious hour listening to some man speak chinese (or japanese...I really don't know the difference) to some other nail tech while watching the Animal Planet on their television. I think whales are their favorite...it's the show that's always on. I think tomorrow I'll venture to ask them to change the channel.

Simplicity or Boredom?

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Mon, 11 May 2009 02:27:00 +0000

Another weekend has flown by with little rest for me. It is true what they say...there is "no rest for the weary." As soon as I left work on Friday afternoon, I made my way home to pack for a straight 24 hours in the Amish countryside of Jamesport, Missouri. I had made the trip before so I partially knew what to expect. There are parts of the trip that I really enjoy and others that really make me want to curl up in the fetal position or click my ruby red slippers together so I can be back home. It really isn't that bad...but, I'm a city girl and the country is never really the ideal place to take a gal like me.

The drive there was good. It gave my mother and I some time to catch up without interuption. Believe me, between her yappy dogs or cooing grandchildren during phone calls or her lack of ability to remember to actually carry her cell phone, it's very hard to keep up a meaningful conversation. She is probably a little ADD. A few things to know about my mom...she is ALL country...she is an extreme home-body...she thrives off of babysitting newborns...and she has some weird obsession with Amish people (to the point I think she was actually thinking about becoming Amish). I don't understand our polar opposite ways. Most of my time is spent explaining to her the meaning of my artistic desires over simplicity. I'm a simple girl with champagne taste (on a budget, of course).

We finally arrived and checked into our cottage. The last time we were there, the place was a bed and breakfast. To my disappoinment, the place was no longer serving breakfast. BUMMER! Amish people DO know how to cook. Luckily, our cottage still had things like indoor plumming, air-conditioning, and television. After a buffet dinner that was quite disappointing, myself, my Grandmother, Mother, Aunt, and Cousin returned to the cottage to watch movies. The last time we did this we had a blast. We stayed up most of the night munching on the wonderful fruit and cheese basket they had in the room and watched the best movies. This year, though, everyone decided to go to bed at 8:30 p.m. The first movie we ditched halfway through and then I had to sit through "Nights in Rodanthe." Nothing better than old people sucking face on the beach in the middle of a hurricane. Brilliant film (sarcasm, of course). I stopped watching halfway through to take my "goodnight" phone call from Steve who had spent his evening chilling out at home by himself. It was a bummer...I was out while he was in (and his "ins" aren't so many lately with his baseball coaching schedule).

The next morning (and after a restless night's sleep for me in a day bed), we hurried out to shop. After the night before and all it's disappointments, I was actually looking forward to the shopping part even if the majority of the items consisted of home made candles smelling of vanilla beans and bright quilts; none of which have a place in my modern apartment. We quickly passed the booths of rusty, country items and finally found our way to some shops that were more my speed. I bought some dessert plates, a cute necklace with my initial, and a decorative "H" for my apartment (because my last name starts with "H"...that wasn't just some random letter I picked out). Mom bought me a decorative kitchen towel that had a cafe mocha on it...which perfectly matches my kitchen decor. I stayed on budget and loved my finds!

Then, we moved on to the emotional part of the weekend (hate those). I agreed to performing a dedication ceremony at the cottage for my cousin who just had a baby about four months ago. It was quick and painless. However, I got the bright idea to get her a card and impart my wisdom about parenthood. I might not be a parent...but I do have some wisdom. Apparently not finding my words that much of a "deal", they actually ignited an outpour of tears from every person in the room. The card basically said that when you don't know what to do or what step to take next, to trust in God and He won't fail to lead you. I knew that would speak to my cousin on a profound level because she is, in essence, raising this baby by herself. I might've cried two tears...I quickly put a stop to that. We whisked ourselves off to the Country Cupboard where we had the best roast beef and green beans. It was a better Saturday than it was a Friday in "Amishville." I picked up some peach cobbler to bring home to Steve and we made our way home.

Steve and I had dinner that night and watched a couple of movies including Fireproof. I really admired the storyline behind the movie and felt that it helped me to understand my relationship with Steve better. He never really made mention of his thoughts about the movie...but I'm sure most of his time was spent thinking about his sunburned face from the baseball games he had all day that day.

That brings us to today. I'm again found in my favorite chair with the Rays Vs. Redsox game playing in the background. I'm praying I win my fantasy baseball game this week...my head to head was against Steve. It'd be good to beat him at his own game! I spent some time with mom, relaxed, and will now find fulfillment in crawling into bed shortly. In all, I'm ready for two consecutive days of laziness. Not sure when I will get those as Steve and I are finding it difficult to plan all of our schedule amidst weddings and birthdays and trips and baseball games. It'll happen...one of these days!

Passing the Baton...

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Fri, 08 May 2009 00:03:00 +0000

I feel like I've run a marathon. My day began at the normal 6:30 a.m. phone call from Steve. These phone calls prompt me to peel my rear out of bed and into the shower. I arrived at work and started right away to clear my desk. Before you knew it, lunch had rolled around and I only had a deposit to prepare. After delegating jobs to the front office staff, they had the same drive for productivity that I'm used to. That, and my part time help has been a very great asset to me the last few days! To tell you the truth, my day would've been full if the doctor would've been in the office. Since he was not, most of the things that I had left to finish were pending his review and approval. Therefore, at about 2 p.m., I let him know that everything was caught up with other than the stack I left on his desk. He gave me the afternoon off and I made my way directly home.

My productivity did not end at 2 p.m., however. Once I got in the door I finished the dishes, did 4 loads of laundry, dusted, and cleaned out my card. I just sat down to eat a bite and put my feet up. Shortly, I'll be enjoying an episode of Grey's Anatomy and then finishing out the night by finishing up my chores (which, now would be the bathroom).

I've been meaning to write a blog entry since last night. I went to church and decided to give the kids a fun night and take them out in the nice weather to play a friendly game of kickball. Of course, they split themselves into boy and girl teams and we set out to play. It was obvious that the boys had more experience with things like kicking and running. At one point, on of my teen girls (who was supposed to be watching 3rd base) was found texting on her cell phone while one of the boys was rounding third base and heading for home...the ball sad near her feet the whole time despite everyone's yelling. The boys won 21 to 1. Towards the end, the entertainment really picked up. Not only did the girl's lack of kick ball skills pose entertainment, but the last inning made me laugh so hard I was literally rolling in the grass. One of the boys (who is a "bigger" boy) found it difficult to run the bases...especially ahead of a very athletic teen boy. On his last lap around the bases, he sat down at third base in the middle of a play. People kept yelling, "Run...run home" and he continued to sit. He looked at me with this serious face and I said, "Get up and run home...you can do it!" It is then that the entertainment began. He looked up and said, "I can't! I ripped my pants!" At this point, I hadn't began laughing until he finally get up. When I thought of rip, I was thinking like a rip in the knee of his jeans or something. Somehow, however, he managed to rip his pants from the knee clear to the waste revealing everything underneath. He frantically tried to hold his pants together so as not to show all to the other kids. I quickly had one of my teen volunteers take him inside to help him out. I came back to the church building to see a cast-looking thing around his leg. They had wrapped packing tape around his leg from his knee to his upper thigh. It is then I realized...kids are a never-ending source of entertainment. I had a good laugh that night.

Okay, I understand this might be a really boring blog entry. However, there is much more to come. For instance, I will be jetting off to Jamesport tomorrow for a weekend with my Mother, Grandmother, Aunt, and Cousin. This should be interesting. Not because it's a bunch of women staying in a little country inn...but because this town is completely full of amish people. So much so, in fact, that I coined the name "Amishville." I'm a city girl that has not one ounce of country appeal. This is why I will be bringing my lap top and movies. Then, next weekend I will meet Steve's parents for the first time...you'll REALLY wanna stay tuned for that one! On to television watching.

Going, Going, Gone...

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Wed, 06 May 2009 03:26:00 +0000

It's almost 10:30 p.m. and I've been going non-stop all day. I've made it my personal mission to spring clean my entire apartment. This includes some very in-depth organizing of every cabinet and closet I have. So far, I've made it through my living room, dining room, and kitchen...not to mention my utility closet in the hallway. I'm feeling pretty productive and just can't wait to get it all done. I sound so lame talking about cleaning my house. However, it's a big thing for me. Mainly because I can't relax until everything is done. Though, I know myself, I'll keep finding details to do. The thing is, I've put off reading several books simply because I can't sit down and read when I know there are things to be accomplished around me. The biggest of all these tasks is my spare bedroom. It has become the catch-all for things that I've meant to put in a garage sale for the last year but don't have a garage to sell them in. However, I have a man that has a garage and sometime in June we'll hold a joint garage sale for it all.

Besides cleaning my house, I've been very productive at work. Things seem to be going a bit smoother since I took the reigns on work assignments. The things seem to be getting done now that I've assigned them to specific people and set a deadline. Not to mention that my part-time help has been a great benefit. That and it's been nice to have someone around that still things I'm nice and enjoys talking to me. When you're boss, people don't tend to want to be social with you. In fact, people like to avoid you altogether. Other circumstances withing the office have been stressing. Though, there are circumstances beyond our control and will hopefully work themselves out in due time. It's still cause for a little rise in my blood pressure. It'll get better, though...it has to.

The weekend with Steve was wonderful. Friday we just relaxed and grilled some steaks. Saturday, I volunteered the both of us to watch my friend's kids. They have a little girl who is 1 and a boy who is 4. I knew from the start that Steve wasn't COMPLETELY sold on the idea. However, we had so much fun playing with the kids that night, I think his tune changed a little. The girl liked him right from the start...go figure! It took a little while for the little boy to get used to him being around. We played outside for a while and then Steve initidated a dance party. Those kids really could get their groove on! We've since started planning for our summer road trips complete with a visit to Saint Louis in a few weeks where we'll stay with friends and enjoy a friendly Cardinals vs. Royals baseball game. Then, we'll hopefully be making our way to Chicago in July to see a Cardinals vs. Cubs baseball game. Of course, Steve also promises that he'll be cheering for the Cubs (to spite me, of course). We've figured out we have very great differences. However, they are differences that make us a better couple. For instance, Steve likes to think he's Italian. He loves Italian food...Italian culture...and he has Italian friends. His love for all things Italy runs so deep that he puts parmesean cheese on EVERYTHING (including things like rice and scrambled eggs). I've since begged him not to include this in his cooking for me. He's been understanding about that. Somehow, this behavior is something I find incredibly adorable. I'll keep his Italian obsession as long as he lets me have my Parisian one. However, I have YET to cook anything with leeks involved. This might come after the 50th dish Steve cooks me with parmesean cheese. All in all, these little things keep me on my toes.

Well, my dishwasher is ready to be unloaded...therefore...I must sign off for now. More to come on my travel plans! Stay tuned!

All Things Work....

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 03:07:00 +0000

I'm sitting here flipping through stuff I can put on my blog when I come across an actual generator that posts random pictures of zits for every hit on the site. It's then I thought, "What kind of wacko wants different pictures of other people's acne on their blog?!" The sad thing is, if the thing exists, someone has used it. Rest assured, I'm not about to. I thank God for my clear complexion!

Today was a typical Wednesday. I feel like I've only blinked since my last blog when, in actuality, it's been a couple days. I discovered my utter distaste for Starbucks Cappuccino. I know, I never thought there would come a day when I would hate something from Starbucks. However, that tasted like straight gasoline! I settled on some Red Diamond Iced Tea instead and was as productive as usual. My head is spinning from all the stuff that needs to be done. I've felt like everything is so disorganized! I tried giving each employee a list of jobs in the order of priority. Thinking that this would bring about more structure to the run of the hub of the office, I was disappointed to see that they completely disregarded such an attempt. A lot of times I feel like it's a lost cause. Everyday, someone is either sick or gone...which adds to my misery. After putting in about 16 hours of overtime this last pay period, I can't imagine them expecting me to put in even more than that to do their work. I'm the only one that works a 40 hour week...I guess I expect too much to hold out hope that someone might actually meet a 40-hour quota...or more. It's frustrating. There are times I wish I could multiply myself times 3 and get everything done in an organized manner. I have to have structure...and right now nothing outside of my little corner is structured. I'm seriously contemplating staying behind Friday afternoon and finishing every ounce of every unfinished project that doesn't belong to me. It's either that, or it just never get done. I've called in some part-time help...hopefully that will make a difference starting tomorrow.

There really wasn't anything else noteworthy that happened today. Besides being completely bewildered at a now ex-employee of the office. I've learned that no matter how sweet and innocent a person may look on the outside, there is usually a very anrgy, self-absorbed, passive-aggressive little person on the inside just dying to get out and play. I've learned not to be passive-aggressive. If I'm going to be anything, I'm going to be straight forward. Why talk bad behind someone's back? What's the point? Go to their face and say what you need to say in a decent, adult manner. That's biblical. I don't get how people can act like such psychos. Me? I just don't know how to control my body language. Apparently when I'm saying, "Could you please make sure this gets done?" I'm actually saying, "Do this now or I'm going to drop kick you." Either way, I was going with the first option there.

It's now time for me to end this Wednesday. My bed beckons me...I'm sure it'll help me rest my mind from this extremely draining day!

The Glamour of the Weekend!

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Tue, 28 Apr 2009 03:03:00 +0000

Weekends seem to be jam-packed for me nowadays. I no longer find myself in on Friday and Saturday nights like I used to. Though, I'm grateful for this new found social life, I also get extremely tired by the end of it all. The weekend started off on Friday night in the Power and Light District of downtown Kansas City. It was my best friend, L's, 40th Birthday and her beau planned a surprise birthday party for her in a cozy little restaraunt in the buzzing P & L. I hurried through my day, dressed my best, picked up a lovely bundle of colorful lillies, and tried to find the closest parking spot to the Bristol restaraunt. P & L has quickly become my favorite spot on the weekends. There are so many things that go on and the night life is fabulous. I found myself in the Alcove room of Bristol.

It was definitely a cozy little spot where we could talk without much background noise. I had to attend stag as Steve had to coach a baseball game that night. I was relieved to see I wasn't the only gal that came alone. It was a great night with wonderful food and lovely conversation with new friends and old.

Saturday really began with my plans being up in the air. I had purchased tickets to the KC Royals game for Steve and I that week and the weather forcast wasn't looking very good. After some lunch and a nap, we headed out to the stadium praying that the storms would somehow find their way around the stadium. The prayers worked...a few drops fell but the game finished with Royals losing by about 8. To add to the night, some drunk guy decided that his $4 beer would be best served dripping down my back. I smelled like beer and peanuts for the rest of the night.

All in all, the weekend proved to be pretty eventful. It ended with the news that the young lady who was going to move in with me for 30 days decided to stay with her mother. I'll still have the chance to mentor her and help her to stand on her own two feet. To tell you the truth, I'm pretty thankful that my apartment will only house me for the time being. I like the peace and solitude of my apartment...now that all doesn't have to change.

Another Warm Body...

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Thu, 23 Apr 2009 02:35:00 +0000

Today has been pretty interesting. By the end of it, my whole path for the next month has changed. I got up and buzzed through work once again. It's amazing how productive I've been during the day. It's when I get home that I find I have the issue. I skipped off to church and spent my hour with the kids working on Mother's Day gifts. On my way home, my phone rang. My mother called to ask me if I could mentor a young woman for 30 days. Since I believe it's important to keep her identity and specifics confidential, I'll share some of what this would include. This young lady is a teenage mother and is currently trying to get her life together with her new baby. Her entire life, she's lived with her mother and hasn't really felt she can spread her wings. She's incredibly sweet and, I believe, very responsible considering this huge life change she just embarked upon. She would live with me for 30 days. During that time, I would act as her "life coach" and help her to set practical goals for living on her own. When I was first asked this, I felt a bit overwhelmed and hesitant. However, the more I thought about it, the more I saw it as an opportunity to minister.

I immediately called Steve to get his thoughts on the situation. Knowing that we're well into a relationship now, I feel it's a must to always confide in each other about life changes of the sort. His reaction to the whole situation was one of the same hesitant thought. I can't say I blame him. For the next month, we would have to find other places to spend time together which means a lot more trips to his house. I don't mind the 35 minute drive it takes to get there but I still wanted to know that he would be okay with such a situation. After talking it through and deciding on some of the stipulations, he supported this new endeavor.

So I'm sitting here now deciding on a plan of action. I couldn't allow this girl to leave my home after 30 days with no life changes or lessons learned. I'm thinking of stressing finances, career, health, and family all centered around biblical principles. Besides helping someone else, I think this will be a huge journey for myself. Hopefully something I've encountered in my life will be of some help to her and that she can walk away feeling more responsible, independent, and self-sufficient. There is more brain storming to be done. However, for now, I feel that this will be a positive experience both for myself and for a mother and her new son.

Not Enough Caffeine in the Cupboard...

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Wed, 22 Apr 2009 03:49:00 +0000

It's about ten minutes till eleven o'clock and I'm sitting in my favorite chair about to commence to writing my blog entry for today. Now, I probably would've skipped this step to the night had Steve decided to call me before he fell asleep on his couch. This has happened several times in the last couple of months of our relationship. Sure, he's worn out from all his extra-curricular work activities. However, I've tried to compell him to call me before he even sits down to relax after a long day. I can almost feel the presence of a night without a last call before it even happens. I send my, "What's your status?" text to receive silence in return. It's a horrible process that no woman should have to endure. I've seriously thought about buying an alarm and hiding it somewhere near the couch in his "man cave" to wake him up at ten thirty if he hasn't yet called me. For some reason, I still don't think this will work. The man bragged about his ability to wake up to just the mere vibration of his phone. Yet, on the second call...no answer...and he has already entered into his very odd dream land. Believe me, if you think my dreams of Willie Nelson are odd, you should hear some of the stuff Steve can come up with on any given night of dreaming. You should all thank him though...he is the muse for a second consecutive blog entry. Thank you, babe...your narcolepsy benefits people all across the country!

Besides scotch taping my eyelids open awaiting the call from the man in my life, I took some time to update my blog. I'm sure I'll be able to add some more little gadgets later...but for now you'll have to deal with a picture of me and a chat room (which, we'll see if anyone feels like being social). Today proved to be quite similar to the last two weeks of my life. On my way to work, I stopped to fill up my gas tank. While being attentive to the pump, I hear a mans voice yell across the parking lot, "Good morning!" I looked around to realize I was the only one there, looked up, and saw a tall man walking into the station and smiling at me. I found this both endearing and strange at the same time. No one should be THAT happy in the morning...especially walking into a convenience store. I nodded in his general direction and immediately stopped the pump and jetted off in case the man was a lunatic. Believe me...I meet them all! I grabbed my morning cup of joe at Starbucks and got to work. I really don't remember much between 8 a.m. and 6 p.m. this evening. It was a really just a whirl of flying papers and charts! I must've gotten SOMETHING done despite my amnesia because the pile on my desk is exceptionally shorter.

I buzzed through the day and attended our staff meeting during lunch. We don't have "regular" staff meetings. Though, within the last month, we've had a staff meeting nearly every week. This one was sort of a release though for myself. I watched intently as my boss defended my position as the supervisor that I am and demanded respect for both himself and the people in charge. I was proud of him. He has a hard time being able to actually voice his frustrations to the rest of the staff and, in a lot of ways, has been too nice and let too much slide. I think he's coming to the conclusion that in a tough time like this, much is to be expected. The truth of the matter is, there are plenty of people out there right now just begging for a job. It's time for the "just getting by" employees to buck up and earn their wages because no job in any company or business is safe with this very unstable economy.

I got back home fully intending on keeping up with my productive ways. However, as soon as I walked into the door of my apartment, I lost all level of concious thinking. So, I gave up. I allowed myself to sit in my chair an feed my brain with the nonsense that is local cable television. I needed that, though. Now, I'm going to peel my rear out of this chair and into my very comfortable bed...where I will sleep until my phone rings at 6:30 a.m. with a voice of a very groggy man saying, "I'm so sorry, babe. I fell asleep again." And then...like the understanding girlfriend I am, I will forgive him...again. :) I've completely forgotten how men are until now. They grunt...they burp...and they fall asleep at the drop of a dime. Oh well...I'm too tired to stay up all night fretting. Chao!

Meet the Parents...

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Tue, 21 Apr 2009 02:44:00 +0000

The last few weeks have been crazy busy! So many changes at work...both losing a provider and switching systems at the same time could be very overwhelming. However, I'm someone who loves a challenge and most of the time can rise to it. I've worked so hard and more hours than I ever have...but I'm enjoying every moment. I'd be lying if I said that it wasn't stressful...it is. The thing that stresses me out the most is feeling like I'm going at it single-handed. I'm in an office full of people and sometimes feel like there isn't many others putting in much effort when it comes to making these changes successful. I mean, we all can't be work-a-holics...but we can be hard-workers. For a while, I was feeling very ganged up on. A lot of times, I'm the bearer of bad news. For most people receiving the bad news, they see me as the bad guy. I've never had a reputation for being mean-spirited. In fact, outside of work, I get along with almost everyone. I Have lots of friends that I love and whom I feel love and enjoy my company. However, most of the time I feel like my presence isn't desired by those working with me in my job. Steve had to bring it to light when he let me know that people in my position aren't generally liked. It's really not me they don't like...it's the idea that I fulfill. With my driven work-ethic, I also expect a lot from people under me. I don't feel I ever expect too much...I just expect effort.

Besides being busy in my professional life, I've been quite busy in my social life. Many people have been following my relationship with Steve for the past few months. We're coming up on 5 months together. That's when I decided to take it to the next level...and we bought a couple of beta fish! Freddy and Francesca got to meet each other this last weekend and Steve and I are already hoping for some little betas. Of course, the only window of opportunity for such a thing is on the weekend when we all come together for our double dates. This will be my 3rd beta...but this time, it's a girl.

Now, that might not be such a serious "taking it to a new level" piece of information. However, the fact of the matter is, the last couple of months have proven to be quite the challenge for both of us. None of what we've gone through in our growing pains has been easy. We've had our fair share of arguments...and I've cried my fair share of tears when frustration took over my ability to get my point across. We're pretty stable in our communication...but in the event of miscommunication, it takes us a little bit to get back on track. Though, I feel we've finally reached a break in the hard parts of this relationship. Which means that, inevitably, there are some things we're about to encounter that are new to the both of us. While we've met each other's friends, my 6-month limit about meeting the parents has held firm. At first, Steve was on board with my parental limits. However, now that things are going well and his parents are chomping at the bit to meet me, the pressure is on. As much as I am looking forward to getting to know Steve's family, I'm also extremely nervous. This will be the first relationship that has made it this far. There are days I'm overwhelmed with how successful this whole thing has been and other days when I'm collected and at peace. None of these things are bad...I think they're natural feelings...just feelings I've never had to feel before. Even through this whole relationship, I would never venture to say whether or not this situation would mean I've met "the one." I'm an advocate of taking my time and not making quick decisions. In fact, it might take me a long while to actually figure all of that out. So the date is set...the end of May I will meet Mr. and Mrs. Steve's Parents. Then, very shortly after that, I'll bring Steve home to be overwhelmed by my huge clan. I'm scared...and excited.

Because of my fear of commitment (i.e. marriage), I feel it's time I face the roots of that fear. The next few months I'll be taking a personal journal to find myself once and for all. Steve will be on the journey with me as we go through every stage of my past...from birth till now. Steve has committed to being our photographer on the journey...so hopefully we can share some photos of my blasts from the past.

Tan in a Can...

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Wed, 01 Apr 2009 03:48:00 +0000

The last few days have been quite amusing and busy at the same time. As I'm frantically trying to prepare for a huge software change at work, I'm also finding a desire to look and feel my best. After starting a Medical Spa at work in the summer, I've discovered my love to be pampered. Recently, the Spa started offering spray tan. Now, being the glow-in-the-dark person I am, I felt this would be a really good opportunity to look like I wasn't a light blub. I showed up to the Spa after work and was instructed to take off my clothes. Now, I figured there would be some level of nakedness involved in this procedure...but I didn't know how incredibly difficult it would be for me to stand almost completely naked in front of someone. In fact, I felt like asking if we could turn the lights off!

So I stripped down to my bottoms and stood (in a very vulnerable state) in front of the aesthetician. I found every yoga-like pose quite uncomfortable...but incredibly worth it in the end. I left a sticky mess and instructed not to wear a bra for the rest of the night. Now, this may seem like an easy task...but that in and of itself is almost worse than being naked...or just as bad, anyway. I got home to get a phone call from my brother begging me to go to a movie with him. By that time, it was almost 9 p.m. and my old self wanted to get into bed. However, he guilted me into it a bit (especially when he drops the "but I'd rather go with you'). I explained to him that I was unable to wear a bra because of the spray tan and so I didn't want to leave the house. At that, I was told to "man up." Pah! A little hard to do. I looked like a braless Oompa Loompa. I finally decided to throw on a sports bra and join my brother for the freakiest movie ever. After being on the edge of our seats most of the night, we walk to the parking lot to be greeted by a down pour. Now, typically, I would've just bolted out to the car. However, I knew if I stepped one foot out the door and into the rain, I would literally melt. In fact, there would be streaks of proof to show for it! So I had Ryan pull up close the door and I bolted into the car. However, with my capri pants, my lower legs got a bit wet. At this, I proceeded to use my hands to try to pat them dry so I don't streak and look really odd. In doing so, I woke this morning to bright orange palms. Yeah...that's attractive.

However, every other part of me looks incredibly normal and tanned. I was pleased despite the difficulty in protecting my tan in a can.

Not Burning Bridges...Cutting Paths...

noreply@blogger.com (Kari) — Sun, 29 Mar 2009 06:37:00 +0000

Blogging has gotten progressively more difficult over the last few months. I'm finding very little spare time to sit down and do the thing I so enjoy. Besides having a lot on my plate at work, I've focused a lot on my friends during the week and usually get home just in time to crash into my very comfy pillow. So, here I am at 1:30 a.m. sitting in bed and wondering when my mind will shut off long enough to allow me to drift to sleep.

The last month has proven to be pretty successful overall. I'm realizing the need to revamp my current ministry and am giving the youth department a new face. In doing so, I've been asked to do the Arkansas Church of God Junior Youth Camp this summer...which adds to my busy schedule. The planning is time-consuming but usually proves to be pretty fun in the process. I'm bringing my group of teens along with me from the church to help and I don't think any of us could be any more excited.

With all this success in my ministry and life, I am finding it even harder to decide when to take my next step and in what direction that next step might be. I've done more thinking about my life and direction that I have in a very long time and have not concluded a thing. I know that I have gotten rid of a lot of negative influences in my life that used to keep me in a rut of confusion. But doing that also got rid of some of my driving forces. It's weird...negativity DOES drive me. If I feel rejected...I work that much harder to be accepted. If I feel like a failure...I work myself to the bone to become a success. In a few areas of my life, I realized a theme of negativity. So much so that I had to rid my life of some people and some things that I truly loved. The outcome was positive...but it also took away the bigger things I focused on. No longer was I seeking acceptance. After being rejected enough times and in enough ways, I find it easy to walk away. Every once in a while I get a hint of curiosity to know what it'd be like to be back in that position. Then, I also realize, I'm a smarter, more successful woman because I could let go.