The Beat Goes On...

Wednesday, May 13th, 2009 at 10:25 p.m.

I have not been able to fight perpetual exhaustion today. Despite my best attempts, the last couple of days have left me in a state of total incoherance. In fact, yesterday morning during my morning conversation with Steve I actually uttered, "I got a bigger ball for my pen." He questioned my reasoning behind that statement since it had absolutely nothing to do with anything we were talking about. Oddly enough, I actually felt like there was something important about that statement but had no idea what it was. Pens are not of great importance...so who knows? It did provide me some mid-morning entertainment when I remembered the conversation and then laughed about it.

I spent my day today keeping up with my daily tasks. Lately, that has been pretty easy. Work has slowed down a bit and I've actually been able to leave a little early on a few occssions this week. That rarely happens. I attended a Blue Cross and Blue Shield seminar today that had me falling asleep in the front row of the conference room. It really wasn't as helpful as I was hoping. Oh well. I'm used to my annual Medicare seminars which have me leaving feeling well informed as well as entertained. That gig is all day and I never get bored. An hour and a half of this seminar today had me wishing I brought some caffiene pills!

I had the kids at church help me make up decorations for the youth camp I'm guest speaker at. THe theme is "God Rocks" so I had them decorate mini guitars. They really liked the project and they all ended up look really great and creative! I returned home to find myself obsessed with some spots on my legs. I'm going to need to get them checked out...they look very similar to basal cell carcinoma. Which is probably the least detrimental out of all the forms of skin cancer a person could have. Nonetheless, I'm still concerned. Hopefully I'm not up all night thinking about skin cancer. It must be all that Izzy stuff on Grey's Anatomy!

The weekend is closer now and I'm facing the famous "meeting of the parents." I'm not much for this as the only people attending will be Steve and I and his parents. This means that I'll be in the spotlight and I'm a better wallflower. I'm a bit shy at first (I know...shocker) but after I get to know the group, can be the life of the party. I feel uncomfortable around people I don't know well...and crowds. It's my social anxiety. The only difference is, I generally feel like punching people in crowds and hiding from small groupings of people I don't know. I'm coming to the conclusion that I'm stranger than I originally thought.

Well, that's all I can come up with for now. I'm about to fall asleep in my favorite chair. I need to take my last call and crawl into my comfy bed. Grey's Anatomy finale is tomorrow which makes me pretty excited...and it's pay day. I don't think you could have a better Thursday. That, and my fingers are telling me it's time for a manicure. I'll spend another glorious hour listening to some man speak chinese (or japanese...I really don't know the difference) to some other nail tech while watching the Animal Planet on their television. I think whales are their favorite...it's the show that's always on. I think tomorrow I'll venture to ask them to change the channel.

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Simplicity or Boredom?

Another weekend has flown by with little rest for me. It is true what they say...there is "no rest for the weary." As soon as I left work on Friday afternoon, I made my way home to pack for a straight 24 hours in the Amish countryside of Jamesport, Missouri. I had made the trip before so I partially knew what to expect. There are parts of the trip that I really enjoy and others that really make me want to curl up in the fetal position or click my ruby red slippers together so I can be back home. It really isn't that bad...but, I'm a city girl and the country is never really the ideal place to take a gal like me.

The drive there was good. It gave my mother and I some time to catch up without interuption. Believe me, between her yappy dogs or cooing grandchildren during phone calls or her lack of ability to remember to actually carry her cell phone, it's very hard to keep up a meaningful conversation. She is probably a little ADD. A few things to know about my mom...she is ALL country...she is an extreme home-body...she thrives off of babysitting newborns...and she has some weird obsession with Amish people (to the point I think she was actually thinking about becoming Amish). I don't understand our polar opposite ways. Most of my time is spent explaining to her the meaning of my artistic desires over simplicity. I'm a simple girl with champagne taste (on a budget, of course).

We finally arrived and checked into our cottage. The last time we were there, the place was a bed and breakfast. To my disappoinment, the place was no longer serving breakfast. BUMMER! Amish people DO know how to cook. Luckily, our cottage still had things like indoor plumming, air-conditioning, and television. After a buffet dinner that was quite disappointing, myself, my Grandmother, Mother, Aunt, and Cousin returned to the cottage to watch movies. The last time we did this we had a blast. We stayed up most of the night munching on the wonderful fruit and cheese basket they had in the room and watched the best movies. This year, though, everyone decided to go to bed at 8:30 p.m. The first movie we ditched halfway through and then I had to sit through "Nights in Rodanthe." Nothing better than old people sucking face on the beach in the middle of a hurricane. Brilliant film (sarcasm, of course). I stopped watching halfway through to take my "goodnight" phone call from Steve who had spent his evening chilling out at home by himself. It was a bummer...I was out while he was in (and his "ins" aren't so many lately with his baseball coaching schedule).

The next morning (and after a restless night's sleep for me in a day bed), we hurried out to shop. After the night before and all it's disappointments, I was actually looking forward to the shopping part even if the majority of the items consisted of home made candles smelling of vanilla beans and bright quilts; none of which have a place in my modern apartment. We quickly passed the booths of rusty, country items and finally found our way to some shops that were more my speed. I bought some dessert plates, a cute necklace with my initial, and a decorative "H" for my apartment (because my last name starts with "H"...that wasn't just some random letter I picked out). Mom bought me a decorative kitchen towel that had a cafe mocha on it...which perfectly matches my kitchen decor. I stayed on budget and loved my finds!

Then, we moved on to the emotional part of the weekend (hate those). I agreed to performing a dedication ceremony at the cottage for my cousin who just had a baby about four months ago. It was quick and painless. However, I got the bright idea to get her a card and impart my wisdom about parenthood. I might not be a parent...but I do have some wisdom. Apparently not finding my words that much of a "deal", they actually ignited an outpour of tears from every person in the room. The card basically said that when you don't know what to do or what step to take next, to trust in God and He won't fail to lead you. I knew that would speak to my cousin on a profound level because she is, in essence, raising this baby by herself. I might've cried two tears...I quickly put a stop to that. We whisked ourselves off to the Country Cupboard where we had the best roast beef and green beans. It was a better Saturday than it was a Friday in "Amishville." I picked up some peach cobbler to bring home to Steve and we made our way home.

Steve and I had dinner that night and watched a couple of movies including Fireproof. I really admired the storyline behind the movie and felt that it helped me to understand my relationship with Steve better. He never really made mention of his thoughts about the movie...but I'm sure most of his time was spent thinking about his sunburned face from the baseball games he had all day that day.

That brings us to today. I'm again found in my favorite chair with the Rays Vs. Redsox game playing in the background. I'm praying I win my fantasy baseball game this week...my head to head was against Steve. It'd be good to beat him at his own game! I spent some time with mom, relaxed, and will now find fulfillment in crawling into bed shortly. In all, I'm ready for two consecutive days of laziness. Not sure when I will get those as Steve and I are finding it difficult to plan all of our schedule amidst weddings and birthdays and trips and baseball games. It'll happen...one of these days!

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